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Where Do You Stand? Hanging With Her and Her Boyfriend

DearSugar — Mon, 15 Sep 2008 15:00:00 -0700

Admittedly, I haven’t always been the biggest fan of all my friends’ boyfriends, but even when I think they’re especially great guys, I still love spending time with just my friend. Of course, I’m happy to oblige a couple hangouts now and then, but in the end, I prefer time with my friends alone. I suppose it’s all about a healthy balance, but where do you stand in terms of spending time with your friends’ significant others? Are you just as happy to be with her and her boyfriend as you are to be with just her?

Source

Handle This: He's Out Almost All Night

DearSugar — Mon, 08 Sep 2008 12:00:00 -0700

Since your boyfriend is heading out for a night with a buddy, you decide to take advantage of having your shared apartment to yourself, assuming he won’t be home until 2 a.m. But when you wake up at a half past three and there’s still no sign of him, you’re concerned and call his cell phone. When he doesn't answer, you start to become a mix of worried and annoyed.

He rolls in just after four, and you’re still awake waiting for him. When you confront him about staying out so late, he starts getting defensive, and claims he shouldn’t have a “curfew.” His response just made you more angry, so how would you handle this?

Source

The How-To Lounge: A Proper Girls' Night Out

DearSugar — Tue, 02 Sep 2008 13:00:00 -0700

Every woman, even the ones that love spending time at home with their significant others, needs a night with their female friends every once and a while. But sometimes even our best intentions for making it a bonding extravaganza gets thrown by the wayside in the midst of drama. If you have a night out with your gal’s coming up, check out my tips for making it as successful and fun as possible. To see them

Dear Poll: Do You Drink to Feel More Comfortable in Social Settings?

DearSugar — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 12:00:00 -0700

Although I do enjoy a drink out with my girlfriends, I definitely know that there’s a difference between drinking socially and drinking to be social. However, many people suffer from anxiety when presented with certain social situations, and the natural effects of alcohol often curb those worries. Though it can lead to more problems than it's worth, it's not surprising to find that some people feel they have to drink to be comfortable among others. Do you drink in order to feel more comfortable socializing? Source

Dear Poll: Do You Drink to Feel More Comfortable in Social Settings?

I drink in a social setting, but I don’t drink to be social.

I’ve done this on occasion.

Yes, I always need a little bit of alcohol to loosen me up.

I don’t drink.

Other — I'll explain

The How-To Lounge: Going Out With a Group

DearSugar — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 07:00:00 -0700

Enjoying a night or weekend with a group is almost always a strange mix of fun and frustration. As exciting as a good group dynamic might be, it can also be difficult to manage. If everyone starts tugging in different directions, it’s not uncommon for tension to build. If you encounter your share of group outings, read my ideas for making them a bit easier and

Do Tell: Are You and Your Friends Socially Compatible?

DearSugar — Sun, 10 Aug 2008 10:00:00 -0700

When you initially make friends with someone, it’s almost always because you have something in common and enjoy each other’s company. But as time flies by and life changes, sometimes the things that brought you together and the activities you enjoyed doing together change.

I’ve distanced myself from a few friends over the years whose lifestyle was no longer conducive to my own — they still want to party every night, and I like to be in bed at a reasonable hour. It’s amazing how changes in social life can make a difference in a friendship. Ladies, do tell: do you find this to be the case with your friends, too? Are you and your friends socially compatible still, or not so much?

Source

The How-To Lounge: Leaving a Lasting Impression

DearSugar — Thu, 31 Jul 2008 13:00:00 -0700

Leaving a lasting impression will not only help your name come to mind in the work place, it'll also up the odds that the cute gent you met will search everywhere for your number the next morning. Since I know there are a few of you out there who'd rather fade into the background than stand out in the crowd, I have a few ideas for how to leave an impression without making a fuss. To see my ideas just

Fun Ways to Get Together With the Girls

DearSugar — Mon, 28 Jul 2008 10:00:00 -0700

Sometimes it seems like we spend so much time focusing on new ways to go on a date or enjoy time with our guy that we forget there's an entire world of ideas for spending time with just our girlfriends. So in support of hanging with your ladies, I've come up with some ideas to make for a memorable time. But feel free to weigh in with other ideas of your own!

Host a good old-fashioned cocktail party with a signature drink and appetizers. Spice it up by asking your friends to each bring their favorite dessert. When you're not munching on finger foods, you can indulge your sweet tooth.
Get active. Slip on your tennis shoes and hit the courts, or pick a safe trail in your town and go for a hike. If guys can have pick-up football games, why can't girls have impromptu sunset strolls?
Take turns giving dinner parties and trading recipes. It's a fun way to bond and learn something new!

To see my other ideas, just

Relationship Protocol: Have You Ever Embarrassed Each Other?

DearSugar — Thu, 24 Jul 2008 16:00:00 -0700

As your relationship develops and you grow closer together, eventually you begin to learn the more intimate details of your partner like his particular neuroses and even his bathroom habits. Being privy to so much private information about the other, it would be simple to break one of the good standby relationship rules — making the other person look good — by revealing one of those intimate details to others. Fortunately, most of us have enough commonsense to avoid such an indiscretion.

But sometimes, whether we're feeling particularly spiteful or simply suffering a slip of the tongue, certain bits of information, opinions, or behaviors, which you'd bother rather keep private, can make their way into a social setting and serious embarrassment can ensue. Hopefully this doesn't happen often, but ladies, have you and your man ever embarrassed each other? If so, was it intentional or totally accidental?

Source

Relationship Protocol: Are You a Good Couple to Hang Out With?

DearSugar — Tue, 22 Jul 2008 16:00:00 -0700

Whether you’re the kind of couple that prefers to spend time with other couples or just hang alone at home, eventually there comes a time when you have to socialize in a larger group setting. Some couples are born to work the crowd; they interact with everyone and then come back and connect with each other every once and a while. They never make anyone feel uncomfortable by arguing or being too affectionate. In essence, even if you’re single or taken, they’re the perfect couple to spend time with.

But, unfortunately, there’s also the other extreme — the couple that you’d never want to be stuck with for more than a moment. Do you know any couples like this? Although we've all had our moments, tell me, are you a good couple to hang out with? And does it depend on the couple or each individual in a relationship?

Source

Relationship Protocol: Making Each Other Look Good

DearSugar — Fri, 11 Jul 2008 12:00:00 -0700

I recently encountered a married couple about to celebrate their 40-year anniversary, and of course, I took the opportunity to ask them what their secret to success has been. Much to my surprise they both agreed that one of the biggest factors in a happy relationship is always making sure the other person looks good. According to them, you should each be the other's number-one fan, which means never a snarky comment or embarrassing story in public. You can disagree all you want at home, but among friends and in a public setting, it’s imperative to always act as your significant other’s cheerleader.

Obviously this worked for them, but what about you? Do you always go out of your way to make your significant other look good in public, even if you don’t necessarily agree with what he’s saying or doing?

Source

The How-To Lounge: Saving Money When Your Friends Aren't

DearSugar — Wed, 09 Jul 2008 10:00:00 -0700

There’s nothing quite like a night out on the town with friends to burn a hole in your pocketbook. In fact, hanging out with people — even a significant other — who aren’t trying to save money can put a serious damper on any budget you might have in place. But there are some great ways to maintain your savings plan while also enjoying the finer things! To see my ideas,

Do Tell: How Have Your Partying Habits Changed?

DearSugar — Fri, 27 Jun 2008 10:00:00 -0700

When we're in college, staying out all night and sleeping the day away is totally acceptable. But as we get older, our hard-partying ways can soften. The older I get, the more I worry about getting enough sleep, as opposed to getting enough booze. Don't get me wrong: I can still pull out all the stops when I need to, and I hate to pass up a good party! But most of the time, I find that my social obligations involve more nice dinners, happy hours, and conversations, coupled with turning in early.

And you know what? It doesn't really bother me, which is possibly the clearest sign that I'm getting older. Do tell: What about you? Did you used to be a big partier and, if so, have you calmed down over time? What parts of partying make you feel old now? If you're still in your party phase, how much longer do you think it will last?

Source

The How-To Lounge: Getting Your Friends to Accept Your Boyfriend

DearSugar — Wed, 25 Jun 2008 10:00:00 -0700

Last week when I posted some tips for incorporating your boyfriend into your group of friends, a few of you mentioned that the reverse was more difficult so I decided to come up with ideas for getting your friends to accept a new boyfriend. To check them out please

Handle This: Totally Ditched

DearSugar — Mon, 23 Jun 2008 12:00:00 -0700

A friend has been down and out lately, so to cheer her up you decide to plan her birthday party for her. You’ve rented a venue with a great DJ, bought some nice bottles of champagne, sent out the invites, and are really looking forward to the occasion.

But come that night, suddenly it seems like everyone who was planning on coming is bailing on you. In fact, the few that do show barely fill the whole table in your private room. Your friend is beside herself, so how do you handle this?

Source

Handle This: Your Friend Is Always Inviting Other People Along

DearSugar — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:00:00 -0700

Lately it seems like whenever you try to hang out with your friend, she adds someone else into the mix. You know she’s more of a social butterfly than you are, but it’s getting ridiculous.

Before the last time you saw her, you specifically told her that you had some personal things that you wanted to talk with her about. As you’re waiting for her at the restaurant, she texts you letting you know that she’s bringing a few more people. You don’t even want to respond, let alone sit through a meal with her, so how do you handle this?

Source

Handle This: Confrontation at a Bar

DearSugar — Fri, 09 May 2008 15:00:00 -0700

While enjoying a night out with friends, you find yourself snaking through throngs of people just to make it to the exit for a breath of fresh air. You’re not trying to be pushy, but the bar is so overly crowded that you inevitably bump into multiple people as you try to get out.

Just as you’re about to make it to the door, you accidentally step on one girl's toes in your four-inch stilettos. You apologize and are about to walk away when she gives you such a huge shove that you nearly fall over. Just as you’re managing to stand up, she spills her beer all over you followed by a phony “oops” and giggles come from her and her friends. You’re not used to women acting like this, so how would you handle this?

Source

Dear Poll: Do You Prefer to Hang With Other Couples?

DearSugar — Tue, 06 May 2008 07:00:00 -0700

As a relationship progresses, it’s likely that there will eventually come a time when you’re with your boyfriend more than you’re apart from him. And even though you might love spending time with your single friends, it’s sometimes easier to hang out with other couples — you get your girl time while simultaneously hanging with your boyfriend, who’s also totally entertained. Though it’s important to spend time with all your friends regardless of their relationship status, tell me ladies, when you’re taken, do you prefer spending time with other couples?Source

Dear Poll: Do You Prefer to Hang With Other Couples?

Yes — I love my single friends, but it's just easier to hang out with other couples.

No — I get sick of the whole double-dating thing; I love just being with the girls.

I don't care either way. All that matters is that I'm with my friends.

Other — I'll explain below

You Asked: How Can I Make Friends?

DearSugar — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 17:00:00 -0700

Dear Sugar,

I'm about to graduate college, and I've already landed myself a real job that I'm very excited about. Once I'm done with school I'll be moving back in with my parents to save money, pay off student loans, and help my mom care for my father and brother who are both disabled. I'm OK with living at home, but the problem is I feel like I'm starting my social scene over. I'm really concerned about making friends. My coworkers are all older women and I'm not really into the bar scene. I don't want to be sitting at home doing nothing all the time. How can I meet new friends?

— Need Friends Nadia

To see DearSugar's answer,

Do Tell: Is Being Too Busy Just an Excuse to Bail?

DearSugar — Mon, 14 Apr 2008 12:00:00 -0700

Everyone gets busy, and things inevitably pop up. Sometimes it’s nearly impossible to follow through on every commitment you make in a week and just as I’ve had to cancel on my friends many times, they’ve also had to bail on me. But lately I’m getting tired of hearing the “I'm just too busy” excuse. Sure every once and a while I think it’s a perfectly good explanation, but sometimes it seems like it's really just the go-to excuse to be flaky. Am I alone on this? Ladies, do tell, do you think being “too busy” gives people a license to be flaky?

Source

Dear Poll: Are You Social Butterflies or Home Bodies?

DearSugar — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 13:00:00 -0700

Isn’t it funny how once we settle into a new relationship, we end up falling into certain patterns. I suppose it’s only natural, but I still find it somewhat remarkable how easy it is to pick up a new routine and how hard it is to break out of one. One of the most common patterns for couples to develop early on is their social routine. Some couples still paint the town red, socializing with their friends, while others feel best at home with just each other — sure, every once and a while you have to mix it up, but for the most part these categories stand. So ladies, when it comes to your usual relationships, which category do you fall in?Source

Dear Poll: Are You Social Butterflies or Home Bodies?

We’re usually social butterflies.

We’re complete homebodies.

We work hard to fall somewhere in the middle.

We're torn; one of us is social, and the other is a homebody.

Other — I'll explain below

The How-To Lounge: Knowing When to Scale It Back

DearSugar — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 10:00:00 -0700

When you have different groups of friends, it's sometimes hard to find the time to see everyone. If you're like me, your week is already booked by Monday afternoon, so if you are feeling the pull of too much socializing, here are some tips on how to manage your time better.

Click here to