DearSugar -- Just ask.

Do Tell: How Did You Meet Your Significant Other?

DearSugar — Thu, 13 Nov 2008 07:30:00 -0800

Most of you have been in at least one relationship before, which means you have a story that explains how you met! I always enjoy hearing how it all began — not only does it give me faith that it can happen to me too, but it gives a lot of insight into the couple and the individuals. Whether it was love at first sight or just a total fluke, do tell, how did you meet your significant other?

Source

The How-To Lounge: New Avenues to Meet People

DearSugar — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 10:00:00 -0700

Meeting new guys is not all that hard — just head out to your local pub for a drink and smile a lot! But meeting quality people who you’d actually want to interact with sober and introduce to your friends is another matter entirely. And while throwing out suggestions like going to a bar or starting up conversations at your gym can be helpful for some, most of us have been there and done that. In an attempt to broaden our horizons, I’ve tried to think outside the dating box. To see my new ideas, just

People Are Not Always How They Appear

DearSugar — Thu, 02 Oct 2008 12:00:00 -0700

Back when I was in high school, I took a leadership class, and though the subject matter was somewhat indefinable, it may have been one of the more valuable classes I had because it taught me life skills like communication and working with other people. In fact, one assignment still lingers with me today. We were asked to share with our classmates what our first impression of them had been and then fill in the following statement:

People usually assume that I ______ but what they'd be surprised to know about me is ______.

It was fascinating to find out how misperceived everyone was. Since I know that this is applicable at any age and point in life, try filling in the blanks yourselves. Tell me: What do people assume about you? But what are you really?

Source

The How-To Lounge: Flirting

DearSugar — Wed, 03 Sep 2008 13:00:00 -0700

Some of us are natural born flirts, but the rest of us have to work at this particular skill set. Luckily, when it comes to flirting, a little can go a long way. If you're one of those girls still searching for your mojo, check out my rules of thumb and

You Asked: I'm Too Shy

DearSugar — Fri, 22 Aug 2008 17:00:00 -0700

Dear Sugar,

I'm a very shy girl who can't seem to strike up a conversation with anyone I don't already feel comfortable with. All of my friends are outgoing and carefree, and I cant even get a date to save my life! I've convinced myself that there is no one of the opposite sex that would possibly be interested in me, which in turn fuels my feelings of loneliness. I've tried to put myself out there but I don't know what else to do when I seriously lack confidence. How can I approach males without feeling like a complete idiot?

— Low Confidence Lila

To see DearSugar's answer,

Five Places to Meet Guys Before Summer's End!

DearSugar — Fri, 22 Aug 2008 07:00:00 -0700

The sun is setting on summertime, which means it's your last chance to meet some eligible bachelors before they go into hibernation come Winter. I've already given you some advice as to how you can jump start your Summer fun, but I'm back to give you my top five places to meet guys in the summertime. Enjoy! Source

The How-To Lounge: Making New Friends

DearSugar — Tue, 05 Aug 2008 15:00:00 -0700

In the unending quest to meet new people, making a new friend seems the most elusive, especially when you've hit the point where quality is always more important than quantity. If you're in need, see my ideas for making new friends when you

The How-To Lounge: Leaving a Lasting Impression

DearSugar — Thu, 31 Jul 2008 13:00:00 -0700

Leaving a lasting impression will not only help your name come to mind in the work place, it'll also up the odds that the cute gent you met will search everywhere for your number the next morning. Since I know there are a few of you out there who'd rather fade into the background than stand out in the crowd, I have a few ideas for how to leave an impression without making a fuss. To see my ideas just

Handle This: You Know It’s Fast, but You've Met Someone Else

DearSugar — Thu, 24 Jul 2008 12:00:00 -0700

After a very troubling and difficult breakup with your long-term boyfriend, you’ve had a few weeks to process things when out of nowhere, you meet a great guy you’re totally attracted to.

You have an amazing time with him and he’s let you know that he really likes you. But it’s only been three weeks since your brutal breakup, and you’re not 100 percent sure you’re not just looking for comfort. You like him, but you still have mixed feelings about your ex. He’s falling for you, so how would you handle this?

Source

Dear Poll: Do You Make a Good First Impression?

DearSugar — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 14:00:00 -0700

Being able to make a good first impression is a gift in all aspects of life, from career to romance. Some people are just born with the ability; their personality oozes good vibes and it takes them no time to make a friend, get hired, or join a new social activity. The rest of us have to make it up — this is where faking confidence comes in handy — or succumb to a mediocre (or bad) impression. While I always strive for the former, I understand how difficult making a worthwhile first impression can be, so ladies let me ask you, is your first impression usually a good one?Source

Dear Poll: Do You Make a Good First Impression?

Yes! I definitely think I come off as pleasant company.

Yea, but it’s not easy. It really takes a lot of effort.

No! People like me eventually, but my first impression never reflects the real me.

It totally depends on the situation.

Other — Please share!

Rule #2 For Jump-Starting Your Summer Fun!

DearSugar — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 13:00:00 -0700

If you're single this Summer, this week is for you! Since the days are long and the nights are warm, I'm here to offer you some tips on how to make the most out of your waking hours and possibly even meet someone to share them with! I hope you enjoy my five rules for jump-starting your Summer fun!

Rule Number 2

Though they may be the most popular places to meet someone, a bar is not always the best spot, so ditch that idea and join an intramural sports team in your neighborhood. The thrill of competition always creates camaraderie, so you can’t help but get to know other people, all while enjoying some much-needed fresh air and sunshine. Plus, there’s always the opportunity for a postgame beer with your favorite teammate! So hop online or ask around the office and find a team that works for you.

Source

Rule #1 For Jump-Starting Your Summer Fun!

DearSugar — Mon, 30 Jun 2008 07:00:00 -0700

If you're single this Summer, this week is for you! Since the days are long and the nights are warm, I'm here to offer you some tips on how to make the most out of your waking hours and possibly even meet someone to share them with! I hope you enjoy my five rules for jump-starting your Summer fun!

Rule Number 1

Mondays are always a drag, but no matter how tired you are, beat those Monday night blues and go out instead of hiding under your covers at home. Since most everyone hates to see the weekend come to an end, Monday nights aren't what they used to be so grab a girlfriend, hit up your local wine bar, and reminisce about your weekends over a glass of wine! Since most wine bars I know get pretty packed, make friends with your tablemates — you never know who you might meet. Keep in mind that meeting Mr. Right can happen anywhere, at anytime so remember to smile and always be approachable!

Source

A Do or Don't: Friends Setting You Up

DearSugar — Wed, 25 Jun 2008 12:00:00 -0700

If you ask a group of couples how they each met, “through a friend” is probably going to appear somewhere near the top of that list. And it makes sense since getting to know someone as a friend of a friend is far less nerve-wracking than just trying to make conversation at a bar or the gym.

But just because it’s more natural to interact with a friend's friend, it doesn’t necessarily mean that you want to let your friends test their matchmaking skills on you. There’s an unquestionable difference between a natural attraction growing into something more and a planned set-up, which even under the best of circumstances can be both awkward and forced. So ladies, has experience been good to you in this capacity? Or have set-ups by your friends made you learn the hard way that it's just not your style?

Source

Things You Forget When You First Start Dating Someone

DearSugar — Tue, 17 Jun 2008 12:00:00 -0700

The thrill of meeting someone whom you connect with can be momentous. But it’s all too easy to let the adrenaline rush and dinner dates go to your head. Before you know it reality can get completely lost in all those exciting emotions, so here are a few reminders to keep you grounded when you first start dating someone.

Just because he’s not “the one” doesn’t mean that you can’t have fun for a little while. But do make sure that you’re both on the same wavelength to avoid any potential hurt feelings.
If you find yourself unsure about your feelings towards him that doesn’t necessarily mean that he’s not “the one.”
People are imperfect — including you.
If you think something is a red flag then you’re probably right.
Attraction alone won’t cut it. No matter how hot he may be or how gorgeous he thinks you are, you’re going to need more eventually.
Your friends will notice if you suddenly start bailing on them.
Giving into your lust isn't always a bad idea, but confusing lust with love is never a good move.
Your friends don’t always know what’s best, but sometimes they really do!

Though dating may be nerve wracking, it should be more fun than not! If you have a reminder for all the newly dating ladies, please share in the comments below!

Source

Handle This: Hit On in Front of Your Boyfriend

DearSugar — Mon, 02 Jun 2008 14:00:00 -0700

At a friend’s party you find yourself wandering around briefly separated from your boyfriend. You settle into the kitchen to fix yourself a new drink and run into a handsome guy. He immediately starts making small chat, and he turns out to be very nice and funny. You try not to lead him on, but you want to be nice and end up talking to him for a few minutes.

You’re laughing at a joke when you catch your boyfriend staring at you out of the corner of your eye. He’s watching exactly what’s happening, so how would you handle this?

Source

You Asked: How Do I Approach My Crush?

DearSugar — Tue, 27 May 2008 17:00:00 -0700

Dear Sugar,

I'm really into this guy who's in my master's program. He's good looking and seems to be into me. We run into each other all the time on campus, and I always catch him looking at me. Though we haven't actually had a small seminar together yet, I am pretty sure he's in the same program. The only problem is we have never actually spoken! I am really shy and have close to no experience pursuing men. Could you give me some tips on how to approach him in a subtle way? I want to make contact without coming off as a crazy stalker.

— Crushing Like Crazy Catherine

To see DearSugar's answer,

Do Tell: How Do You Initiate Conversations With Men?

DearSugar — Sat, 17 May 2008 11:27:52 -0700

This past week I threw out a few suggestions for starting a conversation in a group of women, and some of you mentioned that it’s actually easier to start a convo with men. This makes a lot of sense to me since women seem to be more cautious than men when it comes to initiating any kind of relationship — even on an acquaintance level — but still, I have friends who perpetually avoid initiating a conversation with guys. So help them out and do tell: What do you do or say to get the conversation going with a man?

Source

Conversation Starters to Break the Ice Among Women

DearSugar — Thu, 15 May 2008 10:00:00 -0700

It’s easy to get that first-day-of-school nervousness all over again when you’re in a room full of unfamiliar women who all seem to know each other, which always seems to be the case when it comes to wedding celebrations like bridal showers and bachelorette parties. But breaking the ice one-liners aren’t just for the dating scene. I’ve come up with some first lines for getting the convo started on other occasions, too. To see them and add your own,

You Asked: I'm Painfully Lonely

DearSugar — Tue, 13 May 2008 17:00:00 -0700

Dear Sugar,

I suffered from severe depression in high school and was given medication. While on the antidepressants, I had a suicide attempt. After suffering severe withdrawals from the medication, I decided I did not want to go the medicinal route ever again. I recently moved with my daughter to a new city. I don't know anyone except her father, but we are just friends now. I have explored every avenue of making new friends — gym, mom groups, work, online ads — but have had no success. I have dated a few men but after about two weeks, I don't hear from them again.

Every night I put my child to bed and just sit and watch television. On the weekends, she and I do things together but then I'm alone again. I am starting to feel extremely depressed again from this constant loneliness. I really don't understand what's wrong with me or why I can't manage to develop any new relationships. I can't bear the idea of medication again. What can I do to meet some people and perk up?

In Need of Companionship Corinne

To see DearSugar's answer,

You Asked: I'm Another Girl With the Same Old Question

DearSugar — Mon, 12 May 2008 06:00:00 -0700

Dear Sugar,

I am a long time reader and a first time poster and my question for you is what am I doing wrong? I am a smart, pretty girl and just turned 31, but all through this time I have never had a boyfriend. I have joined some associations and I'm outgoing and funny, but every relationship I start ends in friendship. I've tried Internet dating and now my last effort is for a professional matchmaker. I am getting a bit tired of always being single. Can you help? — Boyfriend-less Becky

To see DearSugar's answer

You Asked: How Can I Make Friends?

DearSugar — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 17:00:00 -0700

Dear Sugar,

I'm about to graduate college, and I've already landed myself a real job that I'm very excited about. Once I'm done with school I'll be moving back in with my parents to save money, pay off student loans, and help my mom care for my father and brother who are both disabled. I'm OK with living at home, but the problem is I feel like I'm starting my social scene over. I'm really concerned about making friends. My coworkers are all older women and I'm not really into the bar scene. I don't want to be sitting at home doing nothing all the time. How can I meet new friends?

— Need Friends Nadia

To see DearSugar's answer,

Do Tell: Do You Go in For the Hug or the Handshake?

DearSugar — Tue, 22 Apr 2008 12:00:00 -0700

A good friend told me about an awkward encounter she had the other day when being introduced to a friend of a friend. Upon their introduction, my friend stuck out her hand for a friendly shake while the stranger went in for an even friendlier hug! She ended up jabbing her hand into the other girl’s abdomen, while simultaneously giving her a side hug. Not only was she embarrassed, but she also couldn’t understand why a girl she didn’t even know would need to hug her on the first meet.

I know the importance of a first introduction, and I've had my fair share of awkward encounters, but I rarely go in for the hug. So ladies, when it comes to introductions, do tell, do you go in for the hug or stick with the safe shake?

Source

Do Tell: Where's the Strangest Place You've Ever Met a Man?

DearSugar — Fri, 28 Mar 2008 11:00:00 -0700

There are a plethora of places to meet eligible men, most commonly the grocery store, the gym, or at a bar, but then there are the more obscure places like in line at the DMV or in the waiting room at your doctor's office where Mr. Right could be lurking. The key to meeting someone is always keeping your eyes and ears open while making yourself approachable. There's no right or wrong venue, so ladies, do tell, where is the strangest place you've ever met a man?

Source

The How-To Lounge: Meeting New People

DearSugar — Fri, 25 Jan 2008 08:00:00 -0800

While I'm sure there are plenty of you out there that have absolutely no problem meeting new people, the rest of us can sometimes feel like there aren't any fish in the sea. Even if you're out and about all the time, it can be easy to fall into the habit of just socializing with your close-knit group of friends instead of branching out and stepping out of your comfort zone. Sometimes the most basic ways to meet new people are the ones that we forget the fastest. To get a reminder course in meeting people before the weekend,

You Asked: Should I See Where This Could Go?

DearSugar — Thu, 06 Dec 2007 06:00:00 -0800

Dear Sugar,

I am writing for some perspective on a recent fling I had. I am studying abroad and we met in Prague. We had a wonderful night of dancing and I ended up back at his hotel. He is Irish and I ended up staying there with his crazy friends for a weekend of fun. He was a perfect gentleman and an awesome lover. The next morning, we all chatted and I felt like I had known them for much longer than just one night. Coincidentally, I had a trip booked to Ireland two weekends later and we had another weekend of great sex and great conversation.

We are now back in our respective cities doing what we were doing before. I have never had an experience like this before and I am not sure if I should let it go and take it for what it was worth, or hold out for what we said when we left — a possibility of a future meeting later on down the road. Any perspective would be much appreciated. — Ireland on my Mind Mindy

To see Dear Sugar's answer

Do Tell: Have You Ever Posted a Personal?

DearSugar — Tue, 09 Oct 2007 07:00:00 -0700

We all meet potential mates in different ways. Some stick to meeting through friends, some like to be set up on blind dates, and others have more luck with Internet dating. Juggling friends, family, and career can make it difficult to meet someone, so why not remedy that by posting a personal ad? Although there is a negative stigma attached to it, ladies, do tell: Have you ever posted or would you ever post a personal ad?

Source