DearSugar -- Just ask.

Ask a Bad Boy: Are Hot Men Only Interested in Hot Women?

DearSugar — Mon, 24 Nov 2008 07:30:00 -0800

Steve Santagati, the author of The Manual, is back! To ask Steve questions of your own, simply submit them here or in the comments section below. Enjoy!

Dear Steve,

I'm no Ugly Betty, but I'm not a super model either, and I'm having a hard time meeting a man. It seems like the hot men I'm attracted to are only attracted to beautiful women — regardless of their personality — and I'm starting to feel incredibly discouraged. Whatever happened to a guy being interested in a woman for her charisma, her humor, or her intelligence? I'm trying hard not to lump all men into the same category, but not one has proven me wrong. Are men really that shallow? Are looks all that matter? — Frustrated Faith

To see Steve's answer

Sunday Confessional: I Told My Friend She Looked Bad

DearSugar — Sun, 09 Nov 2008 09:00:00 -0800

A good friend of mine recently broke up with her live-in boyfriend of three years. Though it was her decision to end things, it was still a difficult choice to make; she still really cares about him. All her friends have been there for her and she's done a great job moving on. In an effort to put the past behind her, she wanted to make a change, so she committed the cardinal breakup sin of changing her look. She'd always had long, dark, beautiful chestnut hair and without consulting any of us, she went to the salon, cut it short, and dyed it blond!She invited me over to come see her new locks and I was speechless — she looked like a completely different person! I could tell that she loved it and I could see a new sense of confidence in her face, but I absolutely hated it. In my opinion, she looked 10 times better before. When she asked my "honest opinion," I gave it to her. I told her it wasn't my favorite look on her. She got incredibly upset, told me I was an unsupportive friend, and asked me to leave her house. Now I'm feeling horrible for hurting my friend's feelings, but I didn't know what to do; she asked me to be honest! I've called her, written her emails, and sent text messages apologizing, but she won't return any of my efforts. I know I should have just lied under the circumstances, but can I be forgiven for speaking the truth?Source

Sunday Confessional: I Told My Friend She Looked Bad

Forgive?

Not forgive?

Undecided

Dear Poll: Would You Want to Be the Better-Looking One?

DearSugar — Tue, 21 Oct 2008 16:00:00 -0700

Even if you don't like to admit it, looks matter. Both our own and those of the people we date. It deems us as shallow if we place too much emphasis on appearance, but when it comes down to it, that's what initially attracts us to one another. I'm always fascinated by people's reaction to the looks discussion and my friends over at Smitten touched upon this topic in a fun, cheeky way. They posed some great questions and I'd like to ask all of you one of them: Would you rather be the better looking one in your relationship? Source

Dear Poll: Would You Want to Be the Better-Looking One?

Yes, absolutely. I'd be too insecure if he was better looking than me.

No, I'd want him to be the better-looking one. I like dating a little out of my league.

It doesn't really matter to me.

Other — Please share

Do Tell: Are You Always Prepared?

DearSugar — Wed, 18 Jun 2008 07:00:00 -0700

You really never know when, where, or how you will meet Mr. Right. I've offered up my fair share of advice on where eligible men could be hiding, but it's important to do your part, too. Of course being approachable is crucial, but so is being the best you at all times — you know, just in case! Now I've never been one to put on my face so to speak before leaving the house, but I have some friends that are perfectly coiffed at all times, even if they're just going to the gym or running to the store to buy eggs. So what about you? Do you aim to look your best at all times, keeping a lipstick and compact close by, just in case you bump into a possible suitor?

Source

Do Tell: Does Being Beautiful Make Things Easier?

DearSugar — Tue, 11 Mar 2008 08:00:00 -0700

When it comes to society’s standards of beauty, there are many common notions: beauty is in the eye of the beholder or beauty is only skin deep, to name a few. But there are sometimes negative stigmas attached to really pretty women — that they get whatever they want and they don't need to work as hard as average looking women do. I try not to think that way, but you know what, sometimes I find myself believing it too. So ladies, do tell, do you think it’s true that good looking women — by society's standards — have it easier?

Source

This or That: Rash or Burn?

DearSugar — Fri, 22 Feb 2008 10:00:00 -0800

You head to the salon the morning of your sister’s wedding of which you’re the maid of honor. You've been instructed to get your hair done and nails done, but unfortunately you woke up having one of those ugly days. Not a great feeling on a day when you know you’ll be taking hundreds of pictures in a short, strapless dress. At the esthetician’s urging — and probably because you’re feeling kind of down — you decide to let her throw in a treatment that you weren’t planning on getting. Would it be worse if you . . .This: Opt to get your brows tidied up with a minor wax and end up with a bright red scabbing burn mark just left of your forehead?Or . . .That: Decide to splurge on the exfoliation treatment with your pedicure, which leaves your legs itching and covered in hundreds of raised red bumps? Source

This or That: Rash or Burn?

This: It might be small, but it’s red, irritated and in the middle of your face.

That: It's just your lower half, but it's all over your lower half.

Dear Poll: Stacked or Slender?

DearSugar — Wed, 06 Feb 2008 08:00:00 -0800

Are you attracted to a specific body type? I like tall guys with a medium build, but I have friends that are really into the skinny, artsy type. I like bigger guys because they make me feel small, but I can appreciate why lanky men like Hayden Christensen are considered sex symbols. So ladies, since we all have such different taste in men, tell me this: Do you like guys that are stacked like Nick Lachey or slender like Adrien Brody?Source

Dear Poll: Stacked or Slender?

Stacked

Slender

Other — Please explain

Dear Poll: Have You Dated Down?

DearSugar — Fri, 16 Nov 2007 09:00:00 -0800

Have you ever walked down the street and wondered why she was with him? That's the first thing I thought when I saw Cate Blanchett and Andrew Upton. Sometimes couples seem to be mismatched, even celebrity couples. Of course, when you don't know their personalities, it's hard to decipher what it is that makes the individuals attracted to one another, but let me ask you this: Have you ever dated a guy that people thought wasn't attractive enough for you? Source

Dear Poll: Have You Dated Down?

Yes — I don't date for looks. I date for personality, charm, and sex appeal.

No — I'm not afraid to admit that looks matter to me.

Other: Please share!

Dear Poll: Do You Like the Attention?

DearSugar — Tue, 06 Nov 2007 16:00:00 -0800

When you walk by a construction site, or pass by a group of men sitting outside a bar, how do you feel when they hoot and holler at you? Some women love the attention they get from strangers, because it gives them an extra boost of confidence, but others take real offense to men ogling them purely based on their appearance. So ladies, what I want to know is...Source

Dear Poll: Do You Like the Attention?

Yes, as sexist as it may sound, it makes me feel attractive and wanted.

No, I feel objectified when men hoot and holler at me.

Other: Please share!

Dear Poll: What Celebrity Statement Annoys you Most?

DearSugar — Thu, 12 Jul 2007 09:00:00 -0700

Celebrities are constantly being interviewed and the general public seems to be getting more and more obsessed with their responses to the tough questions. We want to believe them when they say, "Oh, I never worry about my weight, I am just blessed with good genes" or "I used to sit at home alone on Saturday nights when all my friends would be out on dates" but I think it is fair to say we all want to scream YEAH RIGHT!!! So ladies, what I want to know is, what do you think is the most bogus and annoying celebrity statement? Source

Dear Poll: What Celebrity Statement Annoys you Most?

"I eat whatever I want - I just have a fast metabolism"

"I was teased growing up for being the ugly duckling"

"I never get asked out on dates"

"I'd rather stay home on my couch than go out to celebrity parties"

"I don't read my own reviews/tabloids"

Do Tell: What Are Your Similar Traits?

DearSugar — Wed, 09 May 2007 09:30:00 -0700

I am a perfect mix of my mother and father, but more often than not, people tell me I am my mother's daughter! It is no big surprise that every parent passes down their mannerisms and unique characteristics to their children, but it can be spooky to see some mother/daughter duos that literally mirror each other.

In the spirit of Mother's Day, ladies, do tell, what characteristics or personality traits do you share with your mother?

Dear Poll: Do the Clothes Make the Man?

DearSugar — Wed, 25 Apr 2007 14:45:00 -0700

When you get comfortable with your boyfriend, it isn't hard to tell them him that you despise when he wears his grungy college sweatshirt to breakfast, or his mandles to your best friend's BBQ. But, when you are just dating and getting to know each other, it can sometimes be difficult to get over your new crush's poor taste in clothing. While it is evidently clear how different men are from women, do you feel the clothes make the man? Do you judge your dates by their attire? And more importantly, is a guy with bad taste a deal breaker for you?Source

Dear Poll: Do the Clothes Make the Man?

Yes: A guy that can't dress himself is a major turn off

No: I don't want to date someone who has a better fashion sense than I do

Other: Please share!