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The How-To Lounge: Going Out With a Group

DearSugar — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 07:00:00 -0700

Enjoying a night or weekend with a group is almost always a strange mix of fun and frustration. As exciting as a good group dynamic might be, it can also be difficult to manage. If everyone starts tugging in different directions, it’s not uncommon for tension to build. If you encounter your share of group outings, read my ideas for making them a bit easier and

The How-To Lounge: Catching up on Sleep

DearSugar — Wed, 20 Aug 2008 09:00:00 -0700

It seems like every week I’m playing catch-up on sleep from the previous weekend. In fact, until I actually make a mental note to chill out, relax, and get in some extra Zs, I just keep getting more and more run-down. And I know I’m not alone, so I want to share some of my tricks with those of you who are in desperate need of more sleep. To see them, just

The How-To Lounge: Confrontation Via Email

DearSugar — Tue, 19 Aug 2008 10:00:00 -0700

When a conflict develops between two people, most of the time a direct conversation is the appropriate solution. But sometimes, such a direct approach is just too hard. When it comes to interpersonal issues, any communication is better than none, even if it's through the impersonal Internet. So if you're someone who'd rather bury your head in the sand than verbalize your concerns, or if you think a less explicit talking-to is necessary, then check out my tips for communication via email and

The How-To Lounge: Saying What You Mean

DearSugar — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 14:00:00 -0700

Even though I’m constantly going on and on about the importance of communication, I’ll be the first to admit that communicating well is a very difficult thing to master — there’s a reason why we often refer to miscommunication. Sometimes it’s all too easy for lines to get crossed, and before you know it what you said was not at all what you meant. Since I’m sure this is a common problem, I’ve come up with a few tips so you can finally start saying what you mean. To see them just

The How-To Lounge: Enhancing Your Patience

DearSugar — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 09:00:00 -0700

No matter how easy-going you might be, everyone can lose their temper from time to time. But if you happen to be impatient, well, then biting your tongue or not getting flustered can be very tricky. For that reason I’ve come up with a few ideas to work on increasing your patience. To see them,

The How-To Lounge: Making It Through Something You Just Don't Want to Do

DearSugar — Fri, 08 Aug 2008 09:00:00 -0700

Part of being an adult is doing things you just don’t want to do, so I’m sure most of you have tolerated an occasion that you would have given anything to avoid. Since I’m sure you all have silent suffering down pat, I have a few suggestions for making it through a dreaded event without the agony. Check them out, and

The How-To Lounge: Giving a Lap Dance

DearSugar — Wed, 06 Aug 2008 16:00:00 -0700

Now, I don’t think that anyone should be rushing out and giving lap dances to random gents, but lap dances can be a sexy and fun way to spice up your foreplay. It can also be a serious treat for your man and a great way to take the initiative. To learn my tips,

The How-To Lounge: Making New Friends

DearSugar — Tue, 05 Aug 2008 15:00:00 -0700

In the unending quest to meet new people, making a new friend seems the most elusive, especially when you've hit the point where quality is always more important than quantity. If you're in need, see my ideas for making new friends when you

The How-To Lounge: Stop Comparing Yourself to Others

DearSugar — Mon, 04 Aug 2008 14:00:00 -0700

There’s nothing like comparing yourself to someone else to completely illuminate your insecurities. Whether you’re knocking their choice of boots or feeling particularly envious of them — most of us admit to the up-down glance — by sizing them up against yourself, you’re only serving to further your own worries and self-doubt. So check out my tips on how to free yourself from this possibly detrimental habit and

The How-To Lounge: Making Long-Distance Phone Time

DearSugar — Fri, 01 Aug 2008 14:00:00 -0700

Let's face it: Staying in touch is hard, especially if you have a big family, lots of friends, or entire time zones separating you from the people you love. But the phone is an essential tool when it comes to nurturing long-distance friendships; the problem is finding time to talk.

If you've got friends spread out over the country or the globe, there are a few simple things you can do to make quality talk time. To see my tips and add your own,

The How-To Lounge: Leaving a Lasting Impression

DearSugar — Thu, 31 Jul 2008 13:00:00 -0700

Leaving a lasting impression will not only help your name come to mind in the work place, it'll also up the odds that the cute gent you met will search everywhere for your number the next morning. Since I know there are a few of you out there who'd rather fade into the background than stand out in the crowd, I have a few ideas for how to leave an impression without making a fuss. To see my ideas just

The How-To Lounge: Avoiding the Phone Obsession

DearSugar — Tue, 29 Jul 2008 13:00:00 -0700

It wasn't all that long ago when people used to sit by the phone waiting for a call. But just because times have changed and we can now drag our phone around with us everywhere we go, it doesn't mean that we've stopped the obsessive when-will-they-call behavior. In fact, having access to our phones every minute of every day only makes us more likely to worry about when the darn thing will ring! To work on avoiding this obsessive phone behavior, just

The How-To Lounge: Enjoying a Saturday Night Alone

DearSugar — Fri, 25 Jul 2008 15:00:00 -0700

Since being alone can be scary for some people, and because even the most social person can end up spending a Saturday night alone every now and then, I’ve come up with a few ideas on how to enjoy such an evening by yourself. To embrace your solo side, just

The How-To Lounge: Getting Ready For a Vacation

DearSugar — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 11:00:00 -0700

If you’re lucky enough to have taken a trip recently, then you know how dizzying travel can be. I know, it’s supposed to be relaxing and carefree, but getting out the door and to your destination can be a huge hassle. To see my tips for how to make getting ready for your next vacation a breeze, just

The How-To Lounge: Getting Organized

DearSugar — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 09:00:00 -0700

Even if you’re more clean than messy, it’s still easy to end up with more than a few disorganized piles of stuff lying around the house, office, car, or even in the depths of your purse. Most of us function better in an organized environment, so if you have some clutter getting you down, see my tips and

The How-To Lounge: Becoming More Than Friends

DearSugar — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 15:00:00 -0700

I know a lot of guys that complain that they always end up being friends with the girl that they like and nothing more. Unfortunately, this isn't just something that guys experience, women can find themselves in this situation, too. Often it's that you don't realize you want more from the relationship until the boundaries of your friendship have already been defined, but it is possible to move out of the friend zone. To learn some tips,

The How-To Lounge: Preventing Work-Week Burnout

DearSugar — Thu, 17 Jul 2008 14:00:00 -0700

Between early morning wake-ups, a full day of work or school, the usual obligations like taking out trash and doing laundry, weekdays are both burdensome and exhausting. And while visions of Friday night might keep us relatively sane, I have a few more things to remember while you’re trying to avoid work-week overload. To see them please

The How-To Lounge: Being Supportive Even When You Don’t Feel It

DearSugar — Wed, 16 Jul 2008 09:00:00 -0700

Often we’re faced with situations in life when those who we care about make choices we don’t approve of. Obviously if those decisions put them in harms way then we have to come forward and say something, but otherwise, our differing opinions on their lives can be taken as attacks or judgments. Whether we like it or not, sometimes it’s best to remain supportive even when we don’t feel like it. To see my tips on walking this tricky line,

The How-To Lounge: Combating Postwedding Blues

DearSugar — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 08:00:00 -0700

With all the excitement and energy leading up to a wedding, it's likely that the day after may seem a bit lacking. Add in the emotions, relief, and exhaustion from your big day, and it's a recipe for postwedding blues. But just because the wedding is over doesn't mean you don't have plenty to look forward to in your newlywed status. Check out my advice for combating postwedding blues, and

The How-To Lounge: Becoming More Punctual

DearSugar — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 13:00:00 -0700

If you’ve always been a late person, then being punctual is an important, but oddly challenging, habit to learn. Not only will it come in handy for the boring necessities like paying the bills or making it to the dentist on time, but your friends will be ever so thankful. I’ve put together a few ideas for how to become a person who’s always on time. To see them,

The How-To Lounge: Saving Money When Your Friends Aren't

DearSugar — Wed, 09 Jul 2008 10:00:00 -0700

There’s nothing quite like a night out on the town with friends to burn a hole in your pocketbook. In fact, hanging out with people — even a significant other — who aren’t trying to save money can put a serious damper on any budget you might have in place. But there are some great ways to maintain your savings plan while also enjoying the finer things! To see my ideas,

The How-To Lounge: Having a Fling

DearSugar — Mon, 07 Jul 2008 07:00:00 -0700

Regardless of what the studies may say, there are some women who enjoy a more casual sexual relationship from time to time. Though I know a casual fling isn’t for everyone, if you're a woman who's looking for some fun without the obligations of a relationship, I’ve come up with a few ideas to make a legitimate no-strings attached experience satisfying (and safe). Check them out and

The How-To Lounge: Coping With Rejection

DearSugar — Wed, 02 Jul 2008 09:00:00 -0700

Rejection is an awful mix between being extremely offended and feeling like an utter failure with some shame and humiliation on the side. And of course, even if you try to avoid it, it’s going to happen eventually. While I don’t have any surefire ways to make rejection painless, I do have a few ideas to make it a bit easier. To check them out,

The How-To Lounge: Finding a Therapist

DearSugar — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 10:00:00 -0700

As you already know, I’m a huge supporter of therapy and often suggest it as a means of working through a specific issue — some problems are best solved with professional, and specifically, unbiased help. But finding someone who can meet your specific needs and whom you can trust is not an easy task. I’ve compiled a list of things to consider when seeking a therapist. To check them out

The How-To Lounge: Living in the Present Moment

DearSugar — Thu, 26 Jun 2008 13:00:00 -0700

In this rapid-fire, digital age, living in the present and enjoying the moment can seem about as possible as avoiding a computer monitor for one day. With the speed at which we communicate and interact, learning to take each moment as it comes is more important than ever. Where’s the satisfaction in anything if you can’t even take a minute to enjoy it? Keeping your mind in the here and now is no easy feat, so to see my tips

The How-To Lounge: Getting Your Friends to Accept Your Boyfriend

DearSugar — Wed, 25 Jun 2008 10:00:00 -0700

Last week when I posted some tips for incorporating your boyfriend into your group of friends, a few of you mentioned that the reverse was more difficult so I decided to come up with ideas for getting your friends to accept a new boyfriend. To check them out please

The How-To Lounge: Emergency Situations

DearSugar — Tue, 24 Jun 2008 10:00:00 -0700

It's scary to think about, but emergency situations do present themselves in our lives from time to time. And knowing how to handle them calmly and efficiently is extremely important and can even mean the difference between life and death. Though no one can guarantee how they’ll respond to a situation until they find themselves there, I’ve come up with a few tips should something arise. To see them just

The How-To Lounge: Honeymooning at Home

DearSugar — Mon, 23 Jun 2008 15:00:00 -0700

Though the idea of spending the week after your wedding exploring Mayan ruins, eating real Italian pizza, or lounging in the Caribbean is fantasy worthy, for many newlyweds the reality is that such extravagant (and expensive) honeymoons just aren't possible. But fortunately, there's still plenty of just-married fun to be had without a plane ticket or months of planning. To see my ideas for honeymooning at home please

The How-To Lounge: Your Annual Pelvic Exam, Part II

DearSugar — Thu, 19 Jun 2008 09:00:00 -0700

Now that we all have a few reminders when preparing for an upcoming pelvic exam, I have some quick suggestions for the day of the appointment, too. To see them

The How-To Lounge: Your Annual Pelvic Exam, Part I

DearSugar — Wed, 18 Jun 2008 10:00:00 -0700

I don’t know any women who actually enjoy a trip to the gynecologist, though feelings about settling into the stirrups tend to vary from mild annoyance to extreme anxiety. No matter which end of the spectrum you fall on, it’s important to make the most of your annual exam. To see my suggestions to do just that

The How-To Lounge: Mixing Your Friends and Boyfriend

DearSugar — Mon, 16 Jun 2008 12:00:00 -0700

A boyfriend who can’t stand his girlfriend's friends can wreak havoc on an otherwise happy relationship, while having a boyfriend who enjoys her friends' company is a huge asset in a budding relationship. To check out my advice on how to make the latter an easy task, just

The How-To Lounge: Dealing With Others' Jealousy

DearSugar — Wed, 11 Jun 2008 11:00:00 -0700

True jealousy is never kind or understanding, which is why when you’re confronted with it, it's typically mean, bitter, and just plain hurtful. But looking past the anger, and finding ways to deal with someone else’s jealousy can be very productive. To see my tips on how to do just that,

The How-To Lounge: Letting Go of the Little Things

DearSugar — Mon, 09 Jun 2008 09:00:00 -0700

If you’re anything like me then you probably have a tendency to let the little, everyday stresses build up into big overwhelming worries that nag at you all the time. Learning to let go of the little things will not only save you a daily headache, but allow you the time (and energy) you need to tackle those bigger problems that life just loves to throw our way. Luckily I’ve figured out a few methods to make sure those little worries and irritations don’t overcome you. To see them

The How-To Lounge: Making the Most Out of Your Weekend

DearSugar — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:00:00 -0700

I think we all can agree that when you work or go to school full time during the week, the weekends become sacred. But even so, sometimes the dread of going back to work or exhaustion from the week makes it hard to take advantage of the weekends properly. I know I’ve been guilty of this once or twice before, so check out my advice for making the most out of your weekend,

The How-To Lounge: Soothing the Pre-Wedding Jitters

DearSugar — Wed, 04 Jun 2008 10:00:00 -0700

With all the commitment that goes into a marriage, not to mention the time, energy, and money it takes to plan a wedding, it’s easy to find yourself stressed out and coping with some cold feet come the big day. If you’re feeling more than a little worried about your impending nuptials, just

The How-To Lounge: Maid of Honor Responsibilities on the Big Day

DearSugar — Tue, 03 Jun 2008 08:00:00 -0700

While many of the maid of honor’s duties revolve around wedding planning, when it comes to the big day, she still has many final responsibilities awaiting her. Although the most important job is to keep the bride as stress-free as possible, there are many other details that shouldn’t be overlooked. To see some of the most significant maid of honor duties on the wedding day,

The How-To Lounge: Changing Your Look

DearSugar — Fri, 30 May 2008 11:00:00 -0700

Most of us experience a time in our lives when we have the desire to try something new with our usual look, but making even a small change can seem so dramatic that we usually shy away from it. I think embracing a little change, even in the appearance department, is never a bad thing, though you might want to consult Bella and Fab first! In the meantime, I have some tips on making your change work for you. To see them,

The How-To Lounge: Making a Difficult Decision

DearSugar — Tue, 27 May 2008 13:00:00 -0700

I consider decision making a skill that you have to hone, much like public speaking. No matter how smart, self-assured, or strong willed you may be, when it comes to confidently making a big decision, it requires an entirely different set of tactics. But fortunately, being more decisive is something that can be improved with just a little dedication and a lot of practice. If you find yourself more indecisive than not, just

The How-To Lounge: A Better Night's Sleep

DearSugar — Fri, 23 May 2008 11:00:00 -0700

Our bedrooms are a more important place than we tend to give them credit for — they’re where we completely rejuvenate ourselves for the next day, night after night. While I’m not of the mindset that your bedroom needs to be some kind of untouched sanctuary, I do think that a few touches in or around your bed can do a lot for a good night’s sleep. And, I know if I don’t get enough sleep, I’m an emotional wreck so if you want to see how to create the perfect sleeping spot, just

The How-To Lounge: Bathing Suit Shopping

DearSugar — Thu, 22 May 2008 08:00:00 -0700

We are just one day away from Memorial Day weekend, the start of Summer, which means it’s bathing suit shopping season! When you’re a kid, it's all about finding your favorite colors and prints, but now we actually have to worry about how we look in a swimsuit. Is the cut right? Is anything going to pop out when I move? Is it flattering? Staring at your nearly nude body in a fluorescent lit fitting room can be a discouraging experience, and I’ve often left empty-handed and depressed, but I’ve figured out a few tips for making this experience more productive and positive. To see them,

The How-To Lounge: Offering Advice Others Will Take

DearSugar — Wed, 21 May 2008 15:00:00 -0700

Giving advice can be very complicated. You don’t want to lead anyone astray, and if you want to have your words taken into account, you have to tread very carefully. You need to be honest without ruffling feathers and convincing without becoming demanding. If it sounds tricky, that’s because it is. Luckily, I’ve come up with some tried and true methods for offering advice others will take. You can check it out if you

The How-To Lounge: Calling Someone You Don't Know

DearSugar — Mon, 19 May 2008 11:10:35 -0700

Whether it’s for work or personal reasons, calling someone you don’t know can be very intimidating. For whatever reason — perhaps because all of the normal body-language clues are removed — the phone seems to make even the most mundane conversations a little more awkward and uncomfortable. Fortunately, getting past the fear of the phone just takes some practice, so to learn some tips for calling someone new,

The How-To Lounge: Handling Wedding Season (When You're Not Getting Married)

DearSugar — Fri, 16 May 2008 11:00:42 -0700

Obviously, wedding season is upon us — not just here, but everywhere. Whether you want to avoid the fuss because you're feeling remorseful about your relationship status or you're just sick of hearing about engagements and marriage, it's still pretty impossible to miss out on it all together. But there are a few things to keep in mind while you try to get through the wedding season without going nuts. To see my tips,

The How-To Lounge: Getting Along With Someone You Don't Like

DearSugar — Wed, 14 May 2008 11:00:00 -0700

Regardless of how easygoing, fun to be around, or sweet you may be, it’s inevitable that you’re going to come across someone who you just don’t get along with. We’re all different, and just as we can feel a deep connection with some people, it’s very normal to feel a strong distaste for others. Whether we know them through work, school, or even family, they can be impossible to avoid altogether so the best you can do is try to get along. To find out how,

The How-To Lounge: Bachelorette Etiquette

DearSugar — Tue, 13 May 2008 07:00:00 -0700

One of the best parts about getting married is having a bachelorette party, but deciding who you should invite and what you should do can sometimes make what's supposed to be a carefree event feel more like a tedious chore.

To see my tips on bachelorette etiquette,

The How-To Lounge: Bridal Shower Etiquette

DearSugar — Mon, 12 May 2008 12:00:00 -0700

Traditionally a bridal shower is an opportunity for women to get together to "shower" the bride in the presents that she’ll need to make a home. While certainly times have changed in terms of wedding etiquette, generally, bridal showers have remained the same. To find out some basic shower etiquette and ways to make this traditional event more contemporary,

The How-To Lounge: "Sharing the Pants"

DearSugar — Wed, 07 May 2008 08:00:00 -0700

Though it’s true that some relationships work best when one person is making the big decisions and wearing the pants, so to speak, most relationships need an equal balance. Unfortunately, finding that balance is easier said than done, especially when both halves of the couple have strong personalities. To check out my tips for learning to share that responsibility,

The How-To Lounge: Being Attracted to the Right Type

DearSugar — Wed, 30 Apr 2008 08:00:00 -0700

For whatever reason, most of us continually find ourselves attracted to a certain type of person. Sometimes you don’t even notice it, but you can usually find a common thread that runs throughout your past partners and love interests. Unfortunately, because of this strange phenomenon, many people end up dating the wrong guys over and over again. The only way to break this cycle is to make a conscious effort to change; to learn how

The How-To Lounge: Moving Forward

DearSugar — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 11:00:00 -0700

Even if you’re the one doing the breaking, breaking up isn’t easy. But when you’re the one being rejected and having your heart broken, it’s especially difficult. In my opinion, the very worst part of the breakup is when you actually have to let go. To check out some helpful advice on making this experience easier,

The How-To Lounge: Keeping in Touch With Old Friends

DearSugar — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 13:00:00 -0700

Often, even if we have the best of intentions, life tends to get in the way of staying in touch with the people that we care about. It’s easy to put off a phone call for one week and watch it turn into four, until finally a year’s gone by without a single word exchanged. Before you know it, you’ve inadvertently lost a friend that you really cared about and enjoyed having in your life. To check out tips on avoiding this common problem,