DearSugar -- Just ask.

The How-To Lounge: New Avenues to Meet People

DearSugar — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 10:00:00 -0700

Meeting new guys is not all that hard — just head out to your local pub for a drink and smile a lot! But meeting quality people who you’d actually want to interact with sober and introduce to your friends is another matter entirely. And while throwing out suggestions like going to a bar or starting up conversations at your gym can be helpful for some, most of us have been there and done that. In an attempt to broaden our horizons, I’ve tried to think outside the dating box. To see my new ideas, just

The How-To Lounge: The Art of Seduction

DearSugar — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 09:00:00 -0700

Most men I know would be more than happy to have a woman pursue them, but even still, the idea of making the moves on a guy can be extremely intimidating. What if you look stupid? What if he’s not interested? But once you master the art of seduction, those kind of worries will be the last thing on your mind. So whether you’re in a relationship and ready to do some initiating or you’re a single lady ready to take matters into your own hands, check out my seduction tips when you

The How-To Lounge: Giving a Relationship Another Try

DearSugar — Thu, 02 Oct 2008 13:00:00 -0700

Just because a relationship ends, doesn’t mean that your feelings suddenly come to a screeching halt too. In fact, sometimes without that person in your life, your feelings can grow, and you can be left with the longing to try things over again. Certainly I’ve seen many couples try to give their relationship another go, but not all are successful. So I’ve come up with some things to consider when giving a past relationship another shot. To see them

The How-To Lounge: Hobbies

DearSugar — Tue, 30 Sep 2008 16:00:00 -0700

With life as busy as it is, it can seem like there’s no time to sleep, let alone take up a hobby. But a hobby can actually help you slow down and make invaluable time for yourself during the busiest moments. While I know there are those of us who’ve been rocking a hobby since childhood, I’m sure there are some of us still looking for a way to do something just for ourselves. To see my tips for starting up a new hobby just

The How-To Lounge: Compartmentalizing Emotions

DearSugar — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 13:00:00 -0700

Compartmentalizing has been a buzz term in psychology for some time now, and refers to the habit of consciously separating specific aspects of one's life from others in order to not dwell on bad feelings. For example, if you’ve had a terrible day at work, to properly compartmentalize those negative emotions, you’d leave them at work and go home happy. But while this word is often slung around, actually achieving its purpose is much more difficult. If you're looking to learn more about how to do this, then check out my tips. To see them

The How-To Lounge: Avoiding Lines

DearSugar — Fri, 26 Sep 2008 08:00:00 -0700

If you’re anything like me, then the idea of standing in a line for longer than a minute or two makes you want to go home and crawl under the covers. I’m exaggerating a bit, but you know what I mean — lines can really dampen a mood! If you feel the same way, see my tips for dealing with the dreaded line and

The How-To Lounge: Recouping From a Bad Date

DearSugar — Tue, 23 Sep 2008 13:00:00 -0700

Though I do know people who love to date, many people dread the dating game. It's like playing the love lottery, except if you lose, you've just sacrificed hours of your life for a bad meal and worse company. And while a great date can lead to a wonderful romance, a terrible date can end with a lot of self-pity and general disappointment. So check out my tips for dealing with the fall out from a bad date when you

The How-To Lounge: When Your Wallet Is Lost or Stolen

DearSugar — Mon, 22 Sep 2008 13:00:00 -0700

The feeling in the pit of your stomach you get upon learning your wallet’s missing is about as awful as it gets. But knowing how to properly handle the situation can make a world of difference. Recently, I helped my friend through this mess, so let me share the truly invaluable tips I learned. To get the information just

The How-To Lounge: Rejecting Someone

DearSugar — Tue, 16 Sep 2008 09:00:00 -0700

No matter which end you’re on, rejection is an unpleasant experience. Though in some ways rejecting someone might be easier than being rejected, it can still be difficult to negotiate, especially if you want to do it nicely. So if you’ve got to let someone down easy, I have some tips to share. To see them, please

The How-To Lounge: Giving Back

DearSugar — Mon, 15 Sep 2008 13:00:00 -0700

Everyday growing up my mom would ask me if I had done something kind for another person. And although I always thought answering that question was a real drag, over time I found that I looked for ways to help people so I’d have something to share with her. While I’d like to say I still do this, the truth is sometimes I get so caught up in the worries of my everyday life I forget that there’s a whole bevy of serious issues out there plaguing the world. If you’re like me and looking for an opportunity to give back and do some real good, then just

The How-To Lounge: Time Apart Without Taking a Break

DearSugar — Fri, 12 Sep 2008 14:00:00 -0700

The notion of taking a break in a relationship is one many people ascribe to and one I’ve even recommended before, but it does seem that more often than not, taking a break is simply a step away from breaking up. When it comes down to it, a break may offer clarity, but it doesn’t actually solve any problems — only communication and compromise can do that — which is why I wanted to share some ideas for taking a break that doesn’t require any official breaks at all. To see my ideas, just

The How-To Lounge: Sticking With a Goal

DearSugar — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 13:00:00 -0700

The New Year isn’t the only time for resolutions. In fact, I’d wager to guess that most of us are creating goals all year long. But the problem with goals is that they don’t count for much if you don’t follow through with them. If you need help sticking with your goals, then

The How-To Lounge: Planning a Romantic Occasion

DearSugar — Tue, 09 Sep 2008 13:00:00 -0700

Whether it’s an anniversary celebration or just a time to reconnect, planning a romantic occasion for your significant other can be a lot of fun, and a great way to ignite the fire. To see my tips for making your occasion as sweet (or spicy) as it can be, then

The How-To Lounge: Getting Excited About Fall

DearSugar — Mon, 08 Sep 2008 10:00:00 -0700

I love the Fall; there’s something so special about those months just before Winter. But even though I enjoy the Fall season, for some reason every year, I have a terrible time letting go of Summer and all those long, hot nights. So I’ve come up with some tips for taking the edge off. To see them,

The How-To Lounge: Agreeing to Disagree

DearSugar — Fri, 05 Sep 2008 09:00:00 -0700

Even if you’re about as easy-going as they get, disagreements among friends, family, co-workers, or significant others are inevitable. Often, through numerous conversations and a lot of back and forth, a mutual consensus can be reached, but sometimes there’s no end in sight. But before you throw in the towel completely, I have a few tips for learning how to agree to disagree. To see them just

The How-To Lounge: Flirting

DearSugar — Wed, 03 Sep 2008 13:00:00 -0700

Some of us are natural born flirts, but the rest of us have to work at this particular skill set. Luckily, when it comes to flirting, a little can go a long way. If you're one of those girls still searching for your mojo, check out my rules of thumb and

The How-To Lounge: A Proper Girls' Night Out

DearSugar — Tue, 02 Sep 2008 13:00:00 -0700

Every woman, even the ones that love spending time at home with their significant others, needs a night with their female friends every once and a while. But sometimes even our best intentions for making it a bonding extravaganza gets thrown by the wayside in the midst of drama. If you have a night out with your gal’s coming up, check out my tips for making it as successful and fun as possible. To see them

The How-To Lounge: Going Out With a Group

DearSugar — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 07:00:00 -0700

Enjoying a night or weekend with a group is almost always a strange mix of fun and frustration. As exciting as a good group dynamic might be, it can also be difficult to manage. If everyone starts tugging in different directions, it’s not uncommon for tension to build. If you encounter your share of group outings, read my ideas for making them a bit easier and

The How-To Lounge: Catching up on Sleep

DearSugar — Wed, 20 Aug 2008 09:00:00 -0700

It seems like every week I’m playing catch-up on sleep from the previous weekend. In fact, until I actually make a mental note to chill out, relax, and get in some extra Zs, I just keep getting more and more run-down. And I know I’m not alone, so I want to share some of my tricks with those of you who are in desperate need of more sleep. To see them, just

The How-To Lounge: Confrontation Via Email

DearSugar — Tue, 19 Aug 2008 10:00:00 -0700

When a conflict develops between two people, most of the time a direct conversation is the appropriate solution. But sometimes, such a direct approach is just too hard. When it comes to interpersonal issues, any communication is better than none, even if it's through the impersonal Internet. So if you're someone who'd rather bury your head in the sand than verbalize your concerns, or if you think a less explicit talking-to is necessary, then check out my tips for communication via email and

The How-To Lounge: Saying What You Mean

DearSugar — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 14:00:00 -0700

Even though I’m constantly going on and on about the importance of communication, I’ll be the first to admit that communicating well is a very difficult thing to master — there’s a reason why we often refer to miscommunication. Sometimes it’s all too easy for lines to get crossed, and before you know it what you said was not at all what you meant. Since I’m sure this is a common problem, I’ve come up with a few tips so you can finally start saying what you mean. To see them just

The How-To Lounge: Enhancing Your Patience

DearSugar — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 09:00:00 -0700

No matter how easy-going you might be, everyone can lose their temper from time to time. But if you happen to be impatient, well, then biting your tongue or not getting flustered can be very tricky. For that reason I’ve come up with a few ideas to work on increasing your patience. To see them,

The How-To Lounge: Making It Through Something You Just Don't Want to Do

DearSugar — Fri, 08 Aug 2008 09:00:00 -0700

Part of being an adult is doing things you just don’t want to do, so I’m sure most of you have tolerated an occasion that you would have given anything to avoid. Since I’m sure you all have silent suffering down pat, I have a few suggestions for making it through a dreaded event without the agony. Check them out, and

The How-To Lounge: Giving a Lap Dance

DearSugar — Wed, 06 Aug 2008 16:00:00 -0700

Now, I don’t think that anyone should be rushing out and giving lap dances to random gents, but lap dances can be a sexy and fun way to spice up your foreplay. It can also be a serious treat for your man and a great way to take the initiative. To learn my tips,

The How-To Lounge: Making New Friends

DearSugar — Tue, 05 Aug 2008 15:00:00 -0700

In the unending quest to meet new people, making a new friend seems the most elusive, especially when you've hit the point where quality is always more important than quantity. If you're in need, see my ideas for making new friends when you

The How-To Lounge: Stop Comparing Yourself to Others

DearSugar — Mon, 04 Aug 2008 14:00:00 -0700

There’s nothing like comparing yourself to someone else to completely illuminate your insecurities. Whether you’re knocking their choice of boots or feeling particularly envious of them — most of us admit to the up-down glance — by sizing them up against yourself, you’re only serving to further your own worries and self-doubt. So check out my tips on how to free yourself from this possibly detrimental habit and

The How-To Lounge: Making Long-Distance Phone Time

DearSugar — Fri, 01 Aug 2008 14:00:00 -0700

Let's face it: Staying in touch is hard, especially if you have a big family, lots of friends, or entire time zones separating you from the people you love. But the phone is an essential tool when it comes to nurturing long-distance friendships; the problem is finding time to talk.

If you've got friends spread out over the country or the globe, there are a few simple things you can do to make quality talk time. To see my tips and add your own,

The How-To Lounge: Leaving a Lasting Impression

DearSugar — Thu, 31 Jul 2008 13:00:00 -0700

Leaving a lasting impression will not only help your name come to mind in the work place, it'll also up the odds that the cute gent you met will search everywhere for your number the next morning. Since I know there are a few of you out there who'd rather fade into the background than stand out in the crowd, I have a few ideas for how to leave an impression without making a fuss. To see my ideas just

The How-To Lounge: Avoiding the Phone Obsession

DearSugar — Tue, 29 Jul 2008 13:00:00 -0700

It wasn't all that long ago when people used to sit by the phone waiting for a call. But just because times have changed and we can now drag our phone around with us everywhere we go, it doesn't mean that we've stopped the obsessive when-will-they-call behavior. In fact, having access to our phones every minute of every day only makes us more likely to worry about when the darn thing will ring! To work on avoiding this obsessive phone behavior, just

The How-To Lounge: Enjoying a Saturday Night Alone

DearSugar — Fri, 25 Jul 2008 15:00:00 -0700

Since being alone can be scary for some people, and because even the most social person can end up spending a Saturday night alone every now and then, I’ve come up with a few ideas on how to enjoy such an evening by yourself. To embrace your solo side, just

The How-To Lounge: Getting Ready For a Vacation

DearSugar — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 11:00:00 -0700

If you’re lucky enough to have taken a trip recently, then you know how dizzying travel can be. I know, it’s supposed to be relaxing and carefree, but getting out the door and to your destination can be a huge hassle. To see my tips for how to make getting ready for your next vacation a breeze, just

The How-To Lounge: Getting Organized

DearSugar — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 09:00:00 -0700

Even if you’re more clean than messy, it’s still easy to end up with more than a few disorganized piles of stuff lying around the house, office, car, or even in the depths of your purse. Most of us function better in an organized environment, so if you have some clutter getting you down, see my tips and

The How-To Lounge: Becoming More Than Friends

DearSugar — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 15:00:00 -0700

I know a lot of guys that complain that they always end up being friends with the girl that they like and nothing more. Unfortunately, this isn't just something that guys experience, women can find themselves in this situation, too. Often it's that you don't realize you want more from the relationship until the boundaries of your friendship have already been defined, but it is possible to move out of the friend zone. To learn some tips,

The How-To Lounge: Preventing Work-Week Burnout

DearSugar — Thu, 17 Jul 2008 14:00:00 -0700

Between early morning wake-ups, a full day of work or school, the usual obligations like taking out trash and doing laundry, weekdays are both burdensome and exhausting. And while visions of Friday night might keep us relatively sane, I have a few more things to remember while you’re trying to avoid work-week overload. To see them please

The How-To Lounge: Being Supportive Even When You Don’t Feel It

DearSugar — Wed, 16 Jul 2008 09:00:00 -0700

Often we’re faced with situations in life when those who we care about make choices we don’t approve of. Obviously if those decisions put them in harms way then we have to come forward and say something, but otherwise, our differing opinions on their lives can be taken as attacks or judgments. Whether we like it or not, sometimes it’s best to remain supportive even when we don’t feel like it. To see my tips on walking this tricky line,

The How-To Lounge: Combating Postwedding Blues

DearSugar — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 08:00:00 -0700

With all the excitement and energy leading up to a wedding, it's likely that the day after may seem a bit lacking. Add in the emotions, relief, and exhaustion from your big day, and it's a recipe for postwedding blues. But just because the wedding is over doesn't mean you don't have plenty to look forward to in your newlywed status. Check out my advice for combating postwedding blues, and

The How-To Lounge: Becoming More Punctual

DearSugar — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 13:00:00 -0700

If you’ve always been a late person, then being punctual is an important, but oddly challenging, habit to learn. Not only will it come in handy for the boring necessities like paying the bills or making it to the dentist on time, but your friends will be ever so thankful. I’ve put together a few ideas for how to become a person who’s always on time. To see them,

The How-To Lounge: Saving Money When Your Friends Aren't

DearSugar — Wed, 09 Jul 2008 10:00:00 -0700

There’s nothing quite like a night out on the town with friends to burn a hole in your pocketbook. In fact, hanging out with people — even a significant other — who aren’t trying to save money can put a serious damper on any budget you might have in place. But there are some great ways to maintain your savings plan while also enjoying the finer things! To see my ideas,

The How-To Lounge: Having a Fling

DearSugar — Mon, 07 Jul 2008 07:00:00 -0700

Regardless of what the studies may say, there are some women who enjoy a more casual sexual relationship from time to time. Though I know a casual fling isn’t for everyone, if you're a woman who's looking for some fun without the obligations of a relationship, I’ve come up with a few ideas to make a legitimate no-strings attached experience satisfying (and safe). Check them out and

The How-To Lounge: Coping With Rejection

DearSugar — Wed, 02 Jul 2008 09:00:00 -0700

Rejection is an awful mix between being extremely offended and feeling like an utter failure with some shame and humiliation on the side. And of course, even if you try to avoid it, it’s going to happen eventually. While I don’t have any surefire ways to make rejection painless, I do have a few ideas to make it a bit easier. To check them out,

The How-To Lounge: Finding a Therapist

DearSugar — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 10:00:00 -0700

As you already know, I’m a huge supporter of therapy and often suggest it as a means of working through a specific issue — some problems are best solved with professional, and specifically, unbiased help. But finding someone who can meet your specific needs and whom you can trust is not an easy task. I’ve compiled a list of things to consider when seeking a therapist. To check them out

The How-To Lounge: Living in the Present Moment

DearSugar — Thu, 26 Jun 2008 13:00:00 -0700

In this rapid-fire, digital age, living in the present and enjoying the moment can seem about as possible as avoiding a computer monitor for one day. With the speed at which we communicate and interact, learning to take each moment as it comes is more important than ever. Where’s the satisfaction in anything if you can’t even take a minute to enjoy it? Keeping your mind in the here and now is no easy feat, so to see my tips

The How-To Lounge: Getting Your Friends to Accept Your Boyfriend

DearSugar — Wed, 25 Jun 2008 10:00:00 -0700

Last week when I posted some tips for incorporating your boyfriend into your group of friends, a few of you mentioned that the reverse was more difficult so I decided to come up with ideas for getting your friends to accept a new boyfriend. To check them out please

The How-To Lounge: Emergency Situations

DearSugar — Tue, 24 Jun 2008 10:00:00 -0700

It's scary to think about, but emergency situations do present themselves in our lives from time to time. And knowing how to handle them calmly and efficiently is extremely important and can even mean the difference between life and death. Though no one can guarantee how they’ll respond to a situation until they find themselves there, I’ve come up with a few tips should something arise. To see them just

The How-To Lounge: Honeymooning at Home

DearSugar — Mon, 23 Jun 2008 15:00:00 -0700

Though the idea of spending the week after your wedding exploring Mayan ruins, eating real Italian pizza, or lounging in the Caribbean is fantasy worthy, for many newlyweds the reality is that such extravagant (and expensive) honeymoons just aren't possible. But fortunately, there's still plenty of just-married fun to be had without a plane ticket or months of planning. To see my ideas for honeymooning at home please

The How-To Lounge: Your Annual Pelvic Exam, Part II

DearSugar — Thu, 19 Jun 2008 09:00:00 -0700

Now that we all have a few reminders when preparing for an upcoming pelvic exam, I have some quick suggestions for the day of the appointment, too. To see them

The How-To Lounge: Your Annual Pelvic Exam, Part I

DearSugar — Wed, 18 Jun 2008 10:00:00 -0700

I don’t know any women who actually enjoy a trip to the gynecologist, though feelings about settling into the stirrups tend to vary from mild annoyance to extreme anxiety. No matter which end of the spectrum you fall on, it’s important to make the most of your annual exam. To see my suggestions to do just that

The How-To Lounge: Mixing Your Friends and Boyfriend

DearSugar — Mon, 16 Jun 2008 12:00:00 -0700

A boyfriend who can’t stand his girlfriend's friends can wreak havoc on an otherwise happy relationship, while having a boyfriend who enjoys her friends' company is a huge asset in a budding relationship. To check out my advice on how to make the latter an easy task, just

The How-To Lounge: Dealing With Others' Jealousy

DearSugar — Wed, 11 Jun 2008 11:00:00 -0700

True jealousy is never kind or understanding, which is why when you’re confronted with it, it's typically mean, bitter, and just plain hurtful. But looking past the anger, and finding ways to deal with someone else’s jealousy can be very productive. To see my tips on how to do just that,

The How-To Lounge: Letting Go of the Little Things

DearSugar — Mon, 09 Jun 2008 09:00:00 -0700

If you’re anything like me then you probably have a tendency to let the little, everyday stresses build up into big overwhelming worries that nag at you all the time. Learning to let go of the little things will not only save you a daily headache, but allow you the time (and energy) you need to tackle those bigger problems that life just loves to throw our way. Luckily I’ve figured out a few methods to make sure those little worries and irritations don’t overcome you. To see them