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Dear Poll: Do You Prefer a Serious Man or a Kid at Heart?

DearSugar — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 17:00:00 -0700

I can appreciate a serious guy who is mature and looks at things from a rational point of view, but too much seriousness can be dull. Since I have to be able laugh, I love a guy who's a kid at heart, but not at the expense of his reliability. The ideal guy would possess a perfect combination of both traits, but if you had to choose, what would it be for you? Source

Dear Poll: Do You Prefer a Serious Man or a Kid at Heart?

He’s got to be a kid at heart!

As long as he's not stuffy, I like a serious guy!

I'm completely torn.

Other — Please share.

What Is an Absolute Deal-Breaker in a Relationship?

DearSugar — Thu, 09 Oct 2008 09:00:00 -0700

Maxim magazine's mission was to help its male readers understand us women a little better, and I think it is accomplishing its goal! Asking what chivalrous things you expect a man to do certainly struck a chord with all of you earlier this week, which leads me to believe that you're going to have plenty to say in response to this question, too. So before taking Maxim's survey, I have a question for you to answer right here! As we all know, people make mistakes in their relationships, but some blunders are irreconcilable. So ladies, tell us what you consider absolute deal-breakers when it comes to your relationships.Source

What Is an Absolute Deal-Breaker in a Relationship?

Using online porn.

Flirting with another woman.

Cheating (this includes just kissing another woman).

Lying — about anything.

Other — Please share.

Dear Poll: Is Trust a Given or Is It Earned?

DearSugar — Wed, 08 Oct 2008 13:00:00 -0700

While I completely understand what people mean when they say that trust must be earned, I’m also of the mindset that people should be given the benefit of the doubt. I would never tell you to confess your deepest, darkest secret to someone you barely know, but what’s so wrong in assuming the best in someone? Perhaps this is a naively optimistic view, so what do you think?Source

Dear Poll: Is Trust a Given or Is It Earned?

It’s a given; I rely on someone until they prove themselves untrustworthy.

Definitely earned. I need to know that they’re worthy of my trust.

I'm not sure.

Other — Please share.

Dear Poll: Are You Forgetful?

DearSugar — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 15:00:00 -0700

I used to pride myself on my impeccable memory, but lately I’ve had trouble remembering the silliest things, like the time of my dentist appointment and if I’m supposed to meet my girlfriend on Friday or Saturday night. When I mixed up the latter, my friend said, “you’ve become so forgetful.” And I suppose it’s true, though I blame it all on being too busy, of course. Are you forgetful, too?Source

Dear Poll: Are You Forgetful?

Yes, I’m perpetually forgetful.

No, I always keep track of things.

If I’m really stressed out then I tend to forget things more than usual.

Other — Please share.

Dear Poll: Are You a Phone Person?

DearSugar — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 13:00:00 -0700

Some people are born talkers. They could gab on the phone for hours on end and still find more things to discuss. Then there are those who almost pray to get voicemail in hopes of avoiding a live conversation. I actually consider myself a good phone person, but when the individual on the other end isn't, it can make for some incredibly awkward conversation. Of course face to face communication always makes for higher quality conversation, but tell me, are you a phone person? Source

Dear Poll: Are You a Phone Person?

Yes, I love the phone; I could talk for hours and hours!

No, I'm not a very good phone person; I'm much better in person.

It totally depends on who's on the other end.

Other — Please share.

Dear Poll: Does Your Boyfriend Make You Laugh?

DearSugar — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 10:00:00 -0700

For me, humor isn’t just an important aspect of a significant other; it’s an absolute must. I need to be around someone who can make me laugh, both in the best of times, and also during the worst. I’ve come to realize though that not everyone shares my sentiments. So does your boyfriend’s sense of humor make you giggle?Source

Dear Poll: Does Your Boyfriend Make You Laugh?

Yes, he makes me laugh and I love it.

Actually, I’m the one who makes him laugh.

Sure, we laugh, but sense of humor isn’t the end all be all for me.

Other — Please share.

What's the Average Amount of Time That Passes Between Meeting a Guy and Sleeping With Him?

DearSugar — Fri, 03 Oct 2008 10:00:00 -0700

In an effort to help the male readers of Maxim magazine understand us women a little better, they've asked me to help get you to take their survey about dating, sex, and relationships. Since these are our favorite topics of conversation, this is your chance to clue them in on what women really want: how we like to be treated, what our expectations are, and what their actions say to us — as we all know, some guys need a little direction! There are a bunch of really fun questions, so click here to take their survey and in the meantime answer one of the questions here — how long do you usually wait before sleeping with a guy after meeting him?Source

What's the Average Amount of Time That Passes Between Meeting a Guy and Sleeping With Him?

Less than a week

Two to three weeks

Over a month

How long does it take to get to the nearest bathroom, closet, or alleyway?

Dear Poll: Do You Like to Stand Out in a Crowd?

DearSugar — Thu, 02 Oct 2008 16:00:00 -0700

I’m an observer by nature, but that's not to say I suddenly become shy in a group setting. In fact, I'm happy to be the leader of the pack now and then. Even so, the idea of having all eyes on me does send a shiver down my spine and get my heart racing. But some people are at their best when they can stand out in a crowd. Does that sound like you?Source

Dear Poll: Do You Like to Stand Out in a Crowd?

Yes — What’s wrong with a little attention!

I’m not against it, but you won’t see me trying to stand out.

No way — The best part of being in a crowd is that you get to blend in.

Other — Please share.

Dear Poll: Have You Ever Mistakenly Accused Someone?

DearSugar — Wed, 01 Oct 2008 16:00:00 -0700

Around here we talk a lot about how important it is to trust your instincts, which I’m a huge supporter of. We have those instincts for a reason! But every once and a while wires get crossed somewhere along the way and we misconstrue what are gut is telling us. I know this has happened to me before, and my incorrect instincts have led me to make a false accusation for which later, I felt rather foolish. I’m sure it’s more of an exception than a rule, but have you ever accused someone of something they didn’t do? Source

Dear Poll: Have You Ever Mistakenly Accused Someone?

Nope, my gut instincts have always been right on.

I don’t make an accusation unless I have tangible proof.

Yes, I have done this before.

Other — Please share.

Dear Poll: Have You Ever Had a Secret Admirer?

DearSugar — Tue, 30 Sep 2008 08:00:00 -0700

Perhaps in this day and age when letters have become antiquated, and when a flux of anonymous emails, no matter how sweet, tend to seem creepy, the idea of an honest-to-goodness secret admirer no longer exists. But I’d like to think that it does — remember in Love Actually when Keira Knightley’s character gets the knock at the door from her husband’s best friend with the cards confessing his love? That’s romance! So what do you think; is this notion out of date, or have you ever had a secret admirer?Source

Dear Poll: Have You Ever Had a Secret Admirer?

I've had one, and it was incredibly sweet.

I’ve had an admirer, but it was creepy.

No, I’ve never had a secret admirer.

I’ve actually been one!

Other — Please share.

Dear Poll: Do You Find Others’ Happiness Contagious or Grating?

DearSugar — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 16:00:00 -0700

There’s a reason why “misery loves company” seems to be such a true cliché — for some people, being around happy people when they feel sad is a lot like having someone laugh directly in their face. But learning how to derive happiness from other’s good moods is a great ability, and one I’m still working on! Do you find happiness in others contagious or just irritating?Source

Dear Poll: Do You Find Others’ Happiness Contagious or Grating?

Seeing someone else happy always perks my mood!

When I’m in a bad mood, I don’t want to be around anyone who’s giddy.

It really depends on who the person is.

Other — Please share.

Dear Poll: Can You Have Sex Too Soon in a Relationship?

DearSugar — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 11:00:00 -0700

Whether you’re having it or you’re not, sex is always a personal choice. For some people, the physical act alone is enough to create a pleasurable experience and thus waiting for an emotional connection is unnecessary. But for many, being close to the person you’re engaging in sex with is an absolute requirement, which necessitates more time getting to know each other. Knowing that, I could never distinctly say that there is a “too soon” when it comes to sex in a relationship, but everyone has their own opinion on this matter. What do you think?Source

Dear Poll: Can You Have Sex Too Soon in a Relationship?

If it’s not too soon for you then it’s not too soon!

There's definitely a "too soon," but it varies from person to person.

Sex before a commitment is just a bad idea.

Other — Please share.

Dear Poll: Are You Ashamed of Your Family Secrets?

DearSugar — Fri, 26 Sep 2008 09:00:00 -0700

Leighton Meester is on the current cover of Us Magazine, opening up about the untold story of her family and her upbringing. Although she didn't keep it a secret per se, the fact that she was born in prison wasn't necessarily public knowledge until now. While both of her parents spent time in jail for a drug ring that smuggled marijuana into the United States from Jamaica, Meester seems to look at her experience on the bright side: "It makes me very nonjudgmental and open-minded. And I think it just makes me appreciate the things that I have now." Since we all have our own family secrets, let me ask you this: Are there any secrets that you would be ashamed of if they were made public? Or would you do as Leighton and appreciate the secret for shaping the person you are today?
Source

Dear Poll: Are You Ashamed of Your Family Secrets?

If any of my family secrets came out, I would be extremely ashamed.

I prefer to keep our secrets private, but no, I wouldn't be ashamed if they came out.

We don't really have any family secrets.

Other — please share below!

Dear Poll: Have You Ever Dated Anyone Who's Turned Out to Be Gay?

DearSugar — Thu, 25 Sep 2008 15:00:00 -0700

When we're young, most of us know very little about ourselves, let alone what we want out of our relationships and from our sexuality. So in our earliest relationships, it make sense that we're still in the process of discovering who we are, which is why I don't find it at all shocking when people mention that one of their exes later came out. Has this ever happened to you? Has someone you dated come out as gay, or straight as the case may be, after the fact? Source

Dear Poll: Have You Ever Dated Anyone Who's Turned Out to Be Gay?

No, this hasn't happened to me, but it wouldn’t be a big deal if it did.

Yes, I did have an ex who later came out as gay.

Yeah, but they’re bisexual.

I was actually the one that came out to an ex.

Other — Please share.

Dear Poll: Do You and Your Friends Have the Same Taste?

DearSugar — Thu, 25 Sep 2008 09:00:00 -0700

Going out with friends and meeting new people is one of the best parts of being single. But when your wing woman has the same taste as you, complications are bound to arise. I'm lucky, my single friends and I couldn't have more opposite taste in men, but I've unfortunately witnessed the fallout of two bachelorettes pining over the same guy. Their claws came out and their friendship was never the same. So how do you and your single girlfriends fare in the dating game? Do you tend to have the same taste in men?Source

Dear Poll: Do You and Your Friends Have the Same Taste?

Yes, unfortunately we do have the same taste in men, and it's caused some real problems.

No, thank goodness. We have complete opposite taste.

Sometimes we have the same taste, but we try not to let it get between us.

Other — please share below!

Dear Poll: Have You Ever Said I Love You Without Meaning It?

DearSugar — Tue, 23 Sep 2008 12:00:00 -0700

Saying I love you is a serious step in a relationship and one I don’t think that most people take lightly. But love is not easily defined, and it’s not uncommon for feelings of lust or fascination to be misconstrued as love. And sometimes saying I love you is easier than admitting that you’re not sure how you feel. No matter what the case, those three little words can be complicated, so tell me, have you ever said I love you only to realize you didn’t actually feel it at all? Source

Dear Poll: Have You Ever Said I Love You Without Meaning It?

No, I've always meant it.

Yes, I’ve said it without meaning it.

I’ve realized later on that I didn’t actually feel it, but at the time it was true.

I’ve never said it.

Other — Please share.

Dear Poll: Do You Like Being Single?

DearSugar — Mon, 22 Sep 2008 15:00:00 -0700

There was a time when negative connotations surrounded being single, but today with movies like Sex and the City booming at the box office, it's clear that there's a new image of the single woman. A woman who can take on the world, man or not. While it's promising to see that being single is finally being acknowledged as a choice, it's true that we still live in a society that values partnership. The looming pressure of finding a partner can negate the joys of being totally solo. So for those of you who are currently single (or once were!), I want to know how you fare in this complicated world, so tell me, do you truly enjoy being single? Source

Dear Poll: Do You Like Being Single?

I love it! It's so much fun.

I definitely enjoy it, but I'm looking forward to settling down, too.

I think it's a total drag.

Other — please share below!

Relationship Protocol: Does Your Significant Other Blame Your Period?

DearSugar — Fri, 19 Sep 2008 09:00:00 -0700

Although our periods serve a fabulous purpose, they also comes with a plethora of nasty PMS symptoms: mood swings, volatile emotions, crabbiness, food cravings, bloating — the list goes on and on. And since our period, and everything that comes along with it, only affects us women, it can be an easy target of blame from men. I know from experience how infuriating it is to have your significant other blame your actions on your monthly friend when in fact, your period has absolutely nothing to do with it. I call those assumptions cheap shots! Does this happen in your relationship? Does your significant other ever blame your mood on your period, even when it's nowhere in sight? Source

Relationship Protocol: Does Your Significant Other Blame Your Period?

Yes, he blames my period all the time and it drives me nuts!

No, he's actually never done that.

Other — Please explain below.

Dear Poll: Who Did the Breaking Up in Your Last Relationship?

DearSugar — Thu, 18 Sep 2008 09:00:00 -0700

There's been much debate as to what's harder: being broken up with or doing the actual breaking up yourself. And while neither position is pleasant, chances are we've all experienced both scenarios. Regardless of which is worse, tell me, who initiated the split in your last breakup?Source

Dear Poll: Who Did the Breaking Up in Your Last Relationship?

I did.

He did.

It was mutual.

Other — please share.

Dear Poll: Have You Ever Dated Outside Your Race?

DearSugar — Wed, 17 Sep 2008 16:00:00 -0700

There has been a lot of talk about race on the runway lately and it's got me thinking about the role race plays in relationships. There are many couples out there with varying religious beliefs and conflicting points of views on money, but what about dating someone of a different race? Just like any of the above, dating outside your race can bring a sense of complication to the relationship, but at the end of the day, it's all about the connection and love each person feels for the other. Clearly I'm curious so tell me, have you ever dated outside of your race? Source

Dear Poll: Have You Ever Dated Outside Your Race?

Yes

Other — Please explain below.

Dear Poll: If You Got Pregnant, Would Marriage Come Next?

DearSugar — Wed, 17 Sep 2008 12:00:00 -0700

Unless you’re ready to have children, thinking about a possible pregnancy can be pretty terrifying. But if you’re having sex, there’s always a chance, no matter how slim. And there's no doubt that for better or worse, a pregnancy can drastically alter a relationship. Since I’m sure most of you have considered the possibility, especially if you're in a long-term relationship, tell me, would you expect to marry your significant other if you learned you were pregnant? Source

Dear Poll: If You Got Pregnant, Would Marriage Come Next?

No way. Marriage might come eventually, but not because of a pregnancy.

Definitely. If I were pregnant I would expect to get married no matter what.

Yeah, but only because we’re already planning on it anyway.

Other — Please share.

Relationship Protocol: Do Major Events Cause Arguments?

DearSugar — Tue, 16 Sep 2008 16:00:00 -0700

Just like Thanksgiving and New Years, sometimes personal celebrations cause tension in a relationship, too. Special occasions such as an anniversary or major birthday can be especially overwhelming when factoring in dinner reservations, a gift, and whether or not all of his or her expectations will be met. And even when the pressure is unspoken, it can easily ignite a stressed-out, tension-fueled argument. This has happened to me before so has the stress from a special occasion ever been the root cause of an argument in your relationship?Source

Relationship Protocol: Do Major Events Cause Arguments?

Yes, we both get really uppity around special occasions.

No. We don't place a lot of emphasis on those kinds of events.

It has before but we learned from our argument and now do things differently!

Other — Please share!

Dear Poll: Do You Actually Have Makeup Sex?

DearSugar — Tue, 16 Sep 2008 12:00:00 -0700

The thrill and passion of makeup sex has long been thought of — in the movies at least! — as one of the wonderfully pleasant consequences of a fight. In reality though, most fights don’t end in a torrent of released sexual tension, but maybe it’s something you have to set up from the get-go. In any case, it seems more like a relationship anomaly than regular occurrence to me. So do any of you actually have makeup sex? Source

Dear Poll: Do You Actually Have Makeup Sex?

I’ve definitely had it before, but not regularly.

Yes, the majority of my fights end up getting steamy.

No way, the last thing I feel like doing after a fight is having sex.

Other — please share.

Dear Poll: Do You Yell When You Fight?

DearSugar — Mon, 15 Sep 2008 16:00:00 -0700

Arguments can range from senseless bickering to full-fledged personal attacks. To avoid the latter, I often tell people to refrain from raising their voices; there’s just something about shouting that tends to escalate an argument. But even if you know that, in the heat of the moment and when you feel like you’re not being heard, the urge to yell is natural. So do you yell when you fight?Source

Dear Poll: Do You Yell When You Fight?

I have a tendency to want to yell, but I usually keep myself in check.

Yes, I yell. It just comes out, I can't help it!

No. I never yell.

Other — Please share!

Dear Poll: Are You Overly Picky?

DearSugar — Mon, 15 Sep 2008 10:00:00 -0700

When it comes to dating, I'm all for playing the field and figuring out what you like and what you don't like. And while I'm a firm believer in not settling, I think that notion is often times taken to the extreme. Since no one is perfect, it's easy to find flaws in people, but realistically, it's those imperfections that can be what makes someone unique and special. I think it's good to be selective, but being too picky can lead to missed opportunities, leaving you back at square one: single. I know it's hard not to be somewhat picky, but tell me, do you consider yourself to be picky to a fault? Source

Dear Poll: Are You Overly Picky?

Yes, I am a perfectionist so the little things really get to me.

No, I realize that no one is perfect so I try to look for the positives, not the negatives.

Other — Please explain below.

Dear Poll: Does Your Personality Match Your Astrological Sign?

DearSugar — Fri, 12 Sep 2008 13:00:00 -0700

Over dinner the other night with friends, the astrology came up. My best friend was saying how happy she was that her baby was an Aquarius rather than a Pisces — he made it by two days! Of course, that sparked the debate as to whether or not our personalities match our astrological sign, and the consensus was that they do! So does your personality match the characteristics that fall under your astrological sign? Source

Dear Poll: Does Your Personality Match Your Astrological Sign?

Absolutely! I fit every characteristic of my sign!

Absolutely not! I couldn't be more different than what my sign says I am.

It depends on the day!

Other — I'll explain below.

Dear Poll: Were You Friends First?

DearSugar — Fri, 12 Sep 2008 08:00:00 -0700

Every relationship needs some kind of intense romantic chemistry to get things going initially, but over time it’s natural for a mutual respect more akin to friendship to also develop. For many people, friendship is just what naturally comes about along the way, while others establish that bond before they even begin dating. What about your relationship? Were you friends first or did that come later on?Source

Dear Poll: Were You Friends First?

We were friends first, that’s how we fell for each other.

We both had feelings for each other, but we developed a friendship before we started officially dating.

The passion came first, and we became friends over time.

Other — I'll explain.

Dear Poll: Do You Like Him Freshly Showered or Au Naturale?

DearSugar — Thu, 11 Sep 2008 16:00:00 -0700

I’m assuming we’re all fans of hygiene here, especially in regards to those around us, so I'm sure none us are too keen on a boy who only saves showers for special occasions. That said, there can be something particularly hot about a guy when you catch him just before he bathes. His own musk can be pretty amazing — it’s got to be the pheromones! On the other hand, good-smelling cologne and aftershave can be incredibly sexy, too. Obviously I’m torn, so which do you prefer?Source

Dear Poll: Do You Like Him Freshly Showered or Au Naturale?

I love when he smells so fresh and so clean!

There’s nothing like a guy's natural scent!

I can’t decide between the two; I really like them both.

Other — I’ll explain.

Dear Poll: Which Character Was Your Favorite?

DearSugar — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 15:00:00 -0700

All the 90210 talk has really got me reminiscing about the original series and how much I loved it, especially those Beverly Hills guys! Although I was an incredibly loyal viewer, I wasn't so true to my crushes throughout the years. I started out liking Dylan the best, only to crush later on his best friend Brandon, but at the end of their 10-year run, I was committed to David Silver — who knew he'd turn out so hot? I have a feeling I'm not the only one that had a thing for these characters, so tell me, who was your all-time favorite 90210 stud?Source

Dear Poll: Which Character Was Your Favorite?

Dylan

Brandon

Steve

David

Dear Poll: Are You Spontaneous?

DearSugar — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 12:00:00 -0700

I've always felt that you are either spontaneous or you're not. I'm not! I'm a planner through and through so while jumping in the car or getting on an airplane at a moment's notice sounds exhilarating, that kind of spontaneity would just be way too overwhelming for me. But what about you? Are you the spontaneous type?Source

Dear Poll: Are You Spontaneous?

Yes. I love being spontaneous!

No way. Spontaneity causes me way too much anxiety.

Other — Please explain below.

Dear Poll: Have You Met a Significant Other at Work?

DearSugar — Tue, 09 Sep 2008 14:00:00 -0700

People, myself included, are always saying that it’s best to date outside of your job for fear of professional repercussions, but when you’re around the same people day after day, it’s inevitable that connections are made. In fact, I have a friend who had never been at a new job without meeting a new guy, the last of whom she married! So regardless of the arguments against it, have you ever met a significant other on the job? Source

Dear Poll: Have You Met a Significant Other at Work?

Yes I have before!

I did, but I wouldn't recommend it.

I've had crushes but never started dating someone.

No, I haven't.

Other — Please share below.

Dear Poll: Has Your Taste in Men Changed With Age?

DearSugar — Tue, 09 Sep 2008 09:00:00 -0700

My mom always told me that the guys who fly under the radar are the ones you want to end up with. Of course, in high school and college, that seemed completely out of the question, but the older I get, the more I understand what she was trying to say. I'm sure we've all fallen for the jock or the most popular guy in school, but the most desired man isn't my number one priority any longer. Someone with good values, a good family, and an overall fun-loving personality blows a "cool guy" out of the water any day — I guess my mom was right after all! Has your taste in men changed with age and wisdom? Or have you always been attracted to the same type of guy?Source

Dear Poll: Has Your Taste in Men Changed With Age?

Yes, thank goodness!

No. I've stayed pretty true to my taste.

I've never had a type, so this doesn't really apply to me.

Other — I'll explain below.