Quantcast
 

Handle This: A Surprise You Don't Want

Fri, 05/16/2008 - 8:00am by DearSugar
783 Views - 26 comments

Your birthday is coming up, and you’re really excited to see your family and hang out with your girlfriends. Life has been so hectic lately that you haven’t seen anyone but your boyfriend in what feels like months, so you’re glad to use your birthday as an excuse to get everyone together.

Based on some strange behavior from your boyfriend, and your friends' sudden disinterest in getting together, you’re starting to realize that there might be something going on that you don’t know about. After a quick look at the computer’s Internet history, you realize your boyfriend is planning a weekend away for both of you. You love the gesture, but you really just don’t want to go. You were looking forward to a weekend with friends, so how would you handle this?

Source

on Yahoo!

26 Comments Add a Comment

  • Lovely_1's picture
    Lovely_1
    1

    Go that weekend and plan a belated birthday pary!
    An un-birthday!

    26 weeks 5 days ago Report Comment
  • skigurl's picture
    skigurl
    2

    you suck it up and stop being an ungrateful brat
    then, once your boyfriend surprises you, you act as happy as ever, and (at a later time) you mention to him and your other friends that you'd love a chance to celebrate with everyone, so you plan a night out when you return to celebrate with your family and friends
    then you thank your lucky stars that your boyfriend is kind enough to treat you to something so special, and you take the opportunity to relax and enjoy your time together

    26 weeks 5 days ago Report Comment
  • Kristinh1012's picture
    Kristinh1012
    3

    I would go and be appreciative that he actually put forth the effort to plan something regarless of whether or not it was what I wanted. I would make the most of it. Also after he told me about it I would probably suggest for us to meet up with everyone for dinner and drinks or something either before we leave or when we get back.

    26 weeks 5 days ago Report Comment
  • skigurl's picture
    skigurl
    4

    oh, and if you have any common decency, you do not let on that you've already snooped and ruined the surprise!

    26 weeks 5 days ago Report Comment
  • nicachica's picture
    nicachica
    5

    agree with all the above. that's such a sweet thing to do and you can always plan a girls night out before or after!

    26 weeks 5 days ago Report Comment
  • Sun_Sun's picture
    Sun_Sun
    6

    i also agree with everyone else...especially skigurl

    how mean would it be for me to be like "i dun wanna go, whats wrong with u , how can u do that to me"

    hahah

    26 weeks 5 days ago Report Comment
  • CallaLily's picture
    CallaLily
    7

    I agree with most of the commenters here. Plan a gathering for friends and family after you get back; it's not like that was the last chance on earth to ever see them. You might have a great time on your weekend getaway, so chill. You're really lucky to have someone who surprises you like that.

    26 weeks 5 days ago Report Comment
  • javsmav's picture
    javsmav
    8

    hmm...seeing my family or weekend getaway? yeah, this would never be a dilemma!! I love weekend getaways. Besides, I'd be so happy that my boyfriend PLANNED something. And the fact that my friends are showing disinterest means that they probably know about the trip and we'll party the next weekend. I actually hope this is what happens for my next birthday.

    26 weeks 5 days ago Report Comment
  • apma's picture
    apma
    9

    I just don't understand why this would even be a dilemma unless it was a weekend to do something that you wouldn't want to do, like go hunting when you're a vegetarian. It's a wonderful gesture and a vacation with someone you really care about on your birthday sounds much better than a party with your friends that can easily be delayed.

    26 weeks 5 days ago Report Comment
  • dkaanoi's picture
    dkaanoi
    11

    I second those comments!! Most people women arent fortunate to get a guy that would actually "plan" a weekend getaway for your bday. And if your friends are "real" friends, they would not only understand the situation because it was a suprise, but your boyfriend would definately get some brownie points from the girls!!!

    26 weeks 5 days ago Report Comment
  • Berlin's picture
    Berlin
    12

    It depends on the type of 'getaway' and if his can be postponed. He doesn't have to know that you snooped, so if you really wanted to be a spoiled brat and spend that particular day with friends and such, then you just say "hey we should all do this for my birthday" and his getaway can be pushed back. But like the other commenters, it's not really a dilemma!

    26 weeks 5 days ago Report Comment
  • mn48225's picture
    mn48225
    13

    Yeah, I'd just suck it up and go even though I might be in the mood. I'm sure I will be once I get there. I mean, come on, the whole vacation is planned and all set and I didn't have to do anything! =)

    26 weeks 5 days ago Report Comment
  • lindzn's picture
    lindzn
    15

    I had two bdays last year... found out my then bf was planning a surprise so i organised my own night out a week before with my girlies! I got away with it aswell as it was a 'surprise' so i played dumb and pretended that i had no idea

    26 weeks 5 days ago Report Comment
  • miss jaxx's picture
    miss jaxx
    16

    I would go and appreciate the time and effort he put in to do that for me. Belated birthday celebration the next weekend!

    26 weeks 5 days ago Report Comment
  • arbywhopper's picture
    arbywhopper
    17

    Stop being a party pooper and go on the mini-vacation. Then the next weekend do something with everyone else. Or do something before you leave. Everyone loves to get away. He is trying to be romantic and if you tell him you don't want to go he might stop trying.

    26 weeks 5 days ago Report Comment
  • Allyson N Jason's picture
    Allyson N Jason
    18

    I can't see how I would not look forward to a weekend getaway. That doesn't even sound like me to be mad or not looking forward to that! LOL

    I would NOT let him know that I saw what he was planning.

    I'd totally be stoked but I guess in the context of the scenario, since I've been holed up with my boyfriend for a good while without any other social contact, I'd be looking for a break in that. Well I would go on the trip, enjoy myself and then come back and plan a get-together with friends on the weekend.

    You can tip over TWO drunk men in their chairs with ONE hand this way.

    26 weeks 5 days ago Report Comment
  • popgoestheworld's picture
    popgoestheworld
    20

    I would tell my boyfriend how inconsiderate he was for wanting to monopolize me on the most important day of the year.

    I mean, doesn't he realize it's HIS fault I'd neglected all my friends, and HIS fault he couldn't read my mind that I wanted a big party?

    Stupid men.

    26 weeks 5 days ago Report Comment
  • emalove's picture
    emalove
    21

    Just celebrate with your friends on another day...jeez. It's really thoughtful and sweet that your boyfriend planned something special for your birthday! Do you know how many men just don't do things like that??? I know plenty, trust me.

    Be happy and have fun...you're a lucky girl.

    26 weeks 5 days ago Report Comment
  • miriah15's picture
    miriah15
    23

    I think I would likely be put in a situation like this one day because I'm not a big fan of out-of-town trips! But I would go and pretend to be amazed, just so I don't hurt his ego. Besides, it could turn out to be a blast.

    26 weeks 5 days ago Report Comment
  • Lambsauce's picture
    Lambsauce
    24

    LOL popgoestheworld

    I agree with everyone... just go (and try your hardest to not spoil the surprise!), and celebrate later... if your friends are in on it, they should definitely be willing, especially if they miss you like you're missing them! It's not like your birthday is the only day of the year you can see them!
    Personally, I would be so shocked that my boyfriend actually planned something AND kept it a complete secret from me (surprises are not his forte ) that I'd be overjoyed, regardless of how much I was seeing him lately.

    26 weeks 5 days ago Report Comment
  • Meike's picture
    Meike
    25

    Uh...seriously? I'd go on the weekend getaway, no questions asked! I'd be more elated about that than only throwing something together haphazardly with friends and family. I see them on a near daily basis. We always get together so celebrating on another day is no problem.

    But, really, if I were actually bummed, I would suck it up and go because my SO did a wonderful selfless thing for me. And, as the old saying goes, "Do not look a gift horse in the mouth."

    26 weeks 5 days ago Report Comment
  • evenxstarx's picture
    evenxstarx
    26

    no way in hell i would miss out on a chance to go away with my sweetheart to someplace beautiful .. you can always reschedule with friends

    26 weeks 4 days ago Report Comment

Leave a Comment

To post comments, please sign in or register.



Morsels of goodness, delivered daily.

Enter your email below:
 
 
 
 
 
 

Three Ways To Get Answers:

  1. Group Therapy: Submit your question anonymously to our great community.
  2. Dear Sugar: Send your questions directly to me.
  3. Sunday Confessionals: Write in asking for forgiveness and have others vote for your redemption.
 
 
 
 
 
 
Astrology.com
Enter your birth date: